N Has Fallen

II - Extricated

II - Extricated

ex·tri·cate\ˈek-strə-ˌkāt\
verb
: to free or remove (someone or something) fromsomething (such as a trap or a difficult situation)

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Noah had convinced himself his father wouldn't be coming back. Fuck this life. Fuck his life in particular. He thought bitterly. He did not understand how people could easily tell someone they love them when the next thing they do is walk right out the door. He wants to kill somebody, preferably his ass of a father. How could he leave his Mom after all they've been through and 2 days later he's seen on a date with his aunt! His freaking aunt, his Mom's "bestfriend"! He's just going to be a sperm donor and then left 22 years later? Noah laughed with no humor. And the worst thing out of all of this is his Mom still loves his Dad, like he's done nothing wrong.

His mother lost it, she wasted her life just for a fcking douche bag. Noah cursed himself. Cursed his father. She began self harming and all he could do was nothing. He doubted she'll listen to her son, a reminder of a bastard that was her husband. Noah tried it once, stopping her, but she went into hysterics and she avoided him completely the next day and up to present. She wouldn't listen to him. She was so devastated she wants to kill herself. And he wants to kill his father. No matter how twisted and sick that may sound. How he dared destroy their lives because of a simple fuck! Noah doesn't have a good reputation himself. He'd been in fights everywhere, a college dropout and is banned by several bars multiple times but he never did once consider luring women and fucking them just for the sake of release and fun. Nor did he consider sex to be a way of boosting self confidence. His Mom raised him better than that. He had always been telling himself how stupid he is, he wasn't able to chase his dreams. What would be there to chase when there wasn't a dream to begin with? He felt useless, stupid and helpless. But no matter how stupid he is, he wanted to apologize to himself now. Clearly, his father had outdone him.

He wanted to hit someone, maybe he wanted to hit himself. He wanted to feel pain. But now he was just numb. Seeing his mother all drunk and a crying mess. He almost felt a wave of sympathy. Almost. But he remembered she still loved his ass of a father. His respect for him as a father and a person went out the door the moment he did the same, the moment his mother begged and cried for him to choose her, them. He never listened. Nor did he look back. Noah couldn't stomach the sight infront of him that was his mother weeping her eyes out, asking why his father hadn't returned home yet. So he left.

He felt the wind whipped his face as he speed away with his bike at 160. Right now, he didn't fucking care if he dies. Actually, he wanted to. His father doesn't want him and his mom isn't even in her right state of mind. She wouldn't care if he'll be gone the next morning, same thing applies to his fucking father. He truly was alone. He shouted at the top of his lungs while speeding away. Hoping he could run away with all of the shit the life is throwing at him. But he never could, could he.

He increased his speed some more going to 180 and he knows this fast could kill him but he was prepared to die. No one cares if he does, hell his father would be ecstatic. The one thing that holds him down with his mother is finally dead, he isn't tied up to anyone anymore. He furrowed his brows at the thought. Maybe this is what his father wants. Him being dead.

He let the air slap him in the face, letting it wake him from the nightmare that he was trapped in. But even as he slowed down to the farthest cafe in the city, it didn't do anything. He didn't know what he's doing here. Maybe hoping to find a face to break and then getting punched and dying later. That would be satisfying.

He went inside and all eyes were on him. Scanning.  Some oldies whispered to each other. While some teenagers were ogling. Noah didn't lack in the looks department, he was gifted actually. He almost laughed at himself. What would a pretty face do when he wanted it destroyed. He was the spitting image of his father. But he, Noah, looked far more dangerous. Maybe that was why he craved for pain. Maybe if some random dude punched him hard enough, his stupid face would just resemble a fist. How he would be happy when that time comes. He and his mother would no longer be reminded of his bastard of a father. Some girls were blatantly ogling at him staring at his figure. He ignored them. There were tattoos adorning his body. Some of it creeped out through the thin material of his short sleeved shirt. He knew he attracted female attention but he didn't want any of that. He never did like desperate females.

All the seats were taken except for the table at the top of the double deck. It was a small cafe after all so there weren't that many seats. He made his way there not really knowing what to do. He took a seat and this lanky waiter approached him.

"W-what would you like to order sir?" He stuttered, clearly intimidated by his presence.

"I want whatever the last person ate here." He stated since he didn't really know what to get. He was busy scanning the deck when a folded piece of tissue caught his eye. It was held by the letter N on this compass, indicating North. What a coincidence, since his name starts with N and that was his street name. The letter N hung, like it had already fell earlier but was retrieved and put back.

"But there were two people here sir, do you want all of their previous orders?" He glared at the poor waiter and the latter flinched. He picked up the letter, still folded and held it out to his face.

"Someone forgot something?"

"N-no sir. Those girls were regulars here and the ones in the glasses always lefts letters like this." The waiter who obviously wanted to be anywhere other than being there explained. He was sweating a lot, Noah noticed.

"Get me whatever she ordered." He had no fucking idea what he's doing.

"Yes sir." He scurried off almost tripping his way out of Noah's presence. Noah could have laughed but he was too transfixed by the thing in his hand.

He stared at the letter for about a minute until he decided to unfold and read it.

"Whoever you are reading this,
I don't know if you're in pain or in bliss,
But one thing's for sure,
Someone's there for you, someone loves you.
And as you read this, I pray that you will be okay,
That all good things will come to you,
Because that's what each of us deserves.
-J"

He'd been reading the same letter for about a dozen times. Staring at the most perfect penmanship he'd ever seen. Seeing the letters and words some more, he realized that there is still some kindness and innocence left in this world. It was a short letter and he didn't know if fate exists and if it does he didn't have any idea if it's fucking him up but something about the letter made him feel relieved. Maybe because he was so prepared to die tonight. He was planning on jumping towards a cliff with his bike after here since no one is really up to fight him in this cafe. And the fact that that plan on going to waste his life didn't succeed lift a heavy burden on his heart he didn't know he had.

J

Is this her initials? Quite possibly.

He suddenly wants to meet her.

Soon after, his food arrived. A large sized iced chocolate and a large plate of fries. This was her order? She likes large, he assumed. Well, she wouldn't be dissapointed. He chuckled to himself.

After eating, he stuffed the letter on his pocket, paid the waiter and left.

As soon as he went home, he heard cries. Perfectly normal for a fucked up family. He was about to go to his room when a hand stopped him.

"Noah. My baby boy Noah." He heard his mother's cries behind him. He didn't want to face her, he didn't want to see her. He didn't want her to call him by the name his father gave him, he wants her to wake up, that he's not ever coming back, that he fcked both of their lives and they needed to move on and he needs her with him to do that.

"Go to sleep Mom." His back was still facing her. His voice devoid of anything. Any emotion. Nothing.

"I'm so sorry son. I'm so sorry." She sobbed this time. Noah turned around and faced her. Shock written all over his face. She never apologized after what his father had done. She never said sorry. And the fact that she did this time in this situation shocked him.

"What?" He asked, not sure if he heard her right.

"I said I'm sorry. I have never been a good Mom. I made you rebel against us, made you like this and made your father left us. I know you must hate me. But y-you're all I have." Her voice broke and he almost cried infront of her. "I promise I will be a good mother to you. We're going to get through this together, I promise." She cried and hugged him, the way she hugged Noah when he was little. The last time he remembered her hugging him this hard was on his 6th Grade graduation, when he was salutatorian. She looked so proud then.

He hugged her back. Thanking whoever is listening that finally she has waken up. And as they cried and apologized to each other that night, Noah can't help but wonder, what if he died tonight?