Snatched (On Going) I'm Sorry---have Been Extremely Ill---will Update Soon

TWO.

           I pushed my back farther against the squishy armchair. She opened the door and stepped in. Dr. Carmen was an average height woman. Today she was wearing a loose fitting tie dye shirt. And a pair of cargo shorts. Her hair hung freely around her shoulders and down her back. Her face completely blank of any makeup. She smiled brightly as she sat down behind her desk. I really liked her because she didn't care. She was a doctor whom didn't feel the need to look like one. She used words like rad and groovy. It was pretty clear she had never quite gotten over Woodstock and probably still had sex with all kinds of people but.. I dug her.

       After the incident I didn't speak for weeks. I kept my mouth shut as my wounds healed. I kept my eyes down. I could barely function. She worked with me three times a week. She would just have me hang out with her during my sessions and she would discuss her past with me and let me draw in my sketch pad. I never said anything but she talked to me as if I was her friend. It may have been unorthodox but she made me feel better. She was a very special person to me. I know she was my therapist but I felt like she was also my friend.

       "How are you today, Em?" I swallowed and made a sound of exasperation. "I know you hate that question but... I am your therapist." She tilted her head back and laughed. "Would you like to try to open up about the incident yet?" I knew this was coming. I had been wanting to talk to her about it but I could hardly sleep at night without terrifying dreams, and when I would jerk awake I would not know where I was. It was like I woke up in that basement again. The cold concrete floor that hurt my bones. The damp walls. The place I was convinced I would die. I often woke up in a cold sweat screaming to the top of my lungs.

      I looked at my shoes and opened my mouth once, twice, three times and then on the fourth time the words began to spill from my mouth. "It was my birthday. I was finally 21. I had never been a heavy drinker. My makeup was done so perfectly, my dress was white with sunflowers all about it in different colors. I felt elated. Everything seemed like it would be going all to plan. I wanted to get wasted, just this once. I went down the elevator at my hotel. The club inside the hotel was popping. Everyone was jamming. The music was loud and the people were dancing. I was ready. My best friend and I walked into the club. The bouncer stopped us as was expected. The man stared at my drivers license for a moment. Then he checked his watch.        
"You're not 21 just yet Mrs...Emerson." He said squinting a bit to read my name. I laughed a little nervously. "You still have 5 minutes." I just stared at him. He laughed and checked my friends ID she was almost 4 months older than me. The bouncer laughed and motioned for us both to enter. "Five minutes ain't shit girly, happy birthday! Be safe." I nodded and thanked him.

      The music was loud in the lobby but it didn't prepare me for the assault that met my ears as the door opened. A song I'd never heard of was reverberating against the inside of my skull. People were jam packed into this club. It was unlike anything I'd ever witnessed. I was generally not a people person but tonight I was a new person. At least for the next few hours." I stopped speaking for a moment to catch my breath because this was the first time in nearly a year that I had relieved this night. Mrs. Carmen's eyes were wide with anticipation. The most she had ever heard of this story was watered down to the smallest information possible. This time I was going to give her as much as I could today.  "Emerson, we can take this slowly, you don't have to give me every detail all at once." Her smile was so genuine and kind. "I know. I will tell you all that I can today." She surveyed me for a moment and put her hands together and sat them in her lap.

       I took a deep breath and began to speak again. "There was a lot of people smashed together most of which seemed to be very drunk woman. The lights were dim and flashing multiple colors. Red. Green. Blue. Purple. Yellow. Red. Green. Blue. Purple. Yellow. Over and over. My heart was thudding against its cage of ribs and the adrenaline was beginning to pump. Sam grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the bar.