Snatched (On Going) I'm Sorry---have Been Extremely Ill---will Update Soon

THREE.

I was almost frozen in a memory. I stopped speaking the mental image fading, lights popping behind my eye due to the migraine. "Emerson?" I
heard a far away voice say, and slowly snapped back into reality. I looked up from my hands at Dr. Carmen. She had a look on her face like I had robbed her with a giant cliffhanger but the truth was I was afraid to continue.

The first part of my story was simply beautiful. It seemed like a memory of someone with a great life. Someone whom had just had an amazing birthday but the problem was.. It was the worst birthday of my life. "I am not ready to say more at this mo-mo-ment." I was fighting back hot tears that were stinging in my eyes as my voice broke on the last word. It wasn't easy to relive this night. She sighed and looked at me. "You can take your time. You don't have to continue. We have all the time in the world. However, your session is about to come to a close.. if you wish to continue, I can cancel the rest of my appointments today. I feel as though we are truly making a breakthrough." I looked down at my hands and was quite for a little while, trying to decide whether I could even think of continuing.

"I think I'll have to wait until our next session. I'll see you on Wednesday?" I asked in an apologetic tone. The clock on her desk beeped signaling the end of our session. I stood up and thanked her. As I turned to leave she called after me. "I am proud of you, Emerson. I just want to help you heal." I nodded as the tears swam in my eyes. I opened the door and almost ran down the hall. I passed the receptionist in a blur and ran over the squeaky linoleum floor, and out the automatic doors into the weak morning sunshine.

I passed the people entering the office and ran to my vehicle. My dragon green Volkswagen Bug sat by the curb in the parking spot I left her in and I unlocked the door with fumbling hands and dove inside the car. As soon as I had the door closed I burst into loud, ugly, breathtaking sobs. The truth was I didn't know if I would ever be ready to talk about the incident. My chest hurt from even thinking about it.

It was the worst time of my whole life. I've never been so petrified, so lost, so empty, and so hopeless ever before. I turned on the radio that was connected by bluetooth from my cell phone. The tears were dripping down my face. My head was absolutely bursting with pain from my migraine and the tears were only making it worse. My nose is filled with the strong scent of pine trees or an elegant fucking forest from my air freshener as my engine purrs to life. Tears are still silently falling down my face as I reverse out of my parking spot. I turn the wheel slowly and press the accelerator out onto the main street.

My car moved lazily down the road as I stared ahead. I was trying to focus on the road and dry my tears all the while trying to clear the fog and pain from my head. I was slowly driving past the neighborhood. I lived in a small tight knit community. The thing I hated most about living here was everyone knew what happened to me. Everyone knows my name. Everyone saw my face for months on milk cartons, flyers, the news. I couldn't shop, take my walks through the town, or even drive through town without someone pointing to me or cupping their hand behind their mouths to talk about me.. or even the really ballsy people who would actually ask me if I was her.

Her, like they needed to know for sure that I was the girl whom had been abducted 400 some miles from home on her birthday. Her that is always heavily sedated because the memories are far too vivid to even shut her eyes for longer than a minute at a time. I sighed as the tears began to ease up and only drip irregularly from my eyes. I was now stopped at a redlight the music was drifting out of the speakers. I waited patiently as the light shifted to green and I accelerated. I made a left at the light and headed down another street toward my home.

Before my incident I was contempt living on my own. I had a nice apartment that I shared with Sam and her boyfriend. However, after I returned home once I was found.. I moved back in with my family. I couldn't be alone anymore and I needed love around me at all times. I took the usual turns till I came up on my road. I flipped on my signal and turned off up my long winding driveway.

The Forest seemed to guide me straight to my front door.
I was so used to these surroundings before I was taken that I actually considered asking my family to cut some of them down and put in a pool. Funny how much more beautiful things are after you think you will never see them again.

My mom was still at work and my siblings still at school so for now I was alone. I didn't mind being alone every now and again and appointment days were always a time I was alone. I sat in my idling car for a few minutes finishing one of my favorite songs. The last note faded out and I took my key from the ignition. I grabbed my phone, cigarettes, lighter and purse. I clicked the seat belt lock and released the belt from my chest and stomach.

As I pulled open the door, I stepped out my flip flops making contact with the pavement from our driveway. My home was an old Victorian, the house was large and airy. It was a shocking bright white black shutters on all the windows. The front porch wrapped around the entire house extending even to the back of the house. The front door was huge and made of solid oak.

My mom used to joke that it was our castle door. My grandparents had died in a car crash over 10 years ago and they left my mother their house with only one request: "Do not sell. Leave the house to Emerson when the time comes." The house was my favorite place on earth as a child. I used to get so much enjoyment out of the decor, the fancy glass windows of all colors, And especially the glass room at the top of the house. This is where I used to stay most nights with my grandmother and look up at the stars.

She was such a beautiful person and taken from us at such a terrible time. I sometimes imagine when I am laying under the glass looking at the stars that she is still laying beside me. My grandfather built the room on for her because she worked for NASA before he knew her. He told her that this was all he could give her that even compared to the stars. She spent almost every night after he fell asleep up there for hours just gazing. She was my hero.

When they were hit by a drunk driver they were on their way home from their weekly date, to a fancy upscale restaurant, in a nearby town. They had just called and told my mother they were on the way home. My Gram always came up here after their dates to think about her life. I decided tonight I would be waiting for her.

I laid on the big squishy mint bean bag chair next to her purple one and waited for her. I kept waiting and waiting until finally I fell asleep. I remember waking up that morning and being so upset with myself for not waking up when she got home. I walked downstairs, intending to apologize and promise tomorrow night when I saw mom sitting at the kitchen table her eyes swollen, puffy and a deep shade of red. She had her cellphone clutched in her right hand and as she saw me she began to sob again.