Iron Dad One Shots (mcu)

Tomfoolery on Twitter

A/N: Requested by @PraiseTheCassSass. This is a pure crackfic.

———

Okay, to be completely fair — he started it as a joke.

The username "spiderman" had already been taken, unsurprisingly, but the account was just a fan page run by some kids dedicated to the hero. Which was pretty endearing, all things considered. So Peter decided on "imspiderman" instead. Less professional, but still got the point across. He posted some meaningless tweets, only gaining follows from May, Ned, and a few other people.

He mostly used it to reply to people. He had a large following online, pictures of people who met him or took pictures of him on patrol. There was even some fanart of him.

He had his own little fanbase. How insane was that?

About a month into his internet adventures, he started posting little vlog-type posts. May advised against it out of worry that someone would recognize his voice. He got around it by using a voice modifier in each one (not the stupid interrogation mode, thanks Tony). They weren't the best quality, mostly just him tripping over his words while swinging around buildings. He took selfies with random people on the street and tagged them in posts, giving his account more exposure. It was exciting, honestly.

People started to 'call him out' for being fake or an impersonator. As his follower count grew from hundreds to thousands, more people thought the whole thing was a sham. They'd DM him asking an extensive amount of questions (that always, without fail, would ask him for his real name) that he'd simply disregard or delete, or send the ever-classy "I'm Spider-Man, so hop off my dick" reply. He didn't need the negativity in his life.

One day, in Tony's lab, he was scrolling through old posts when he felt Tony's presence over his shoulder. He would say he could feel it because of his spider sense, but in reality Tony just had that I'm more rich than a white kid with AirPods vibe that not even normal people could shake.

"Kid, did you get a Twitter?"

Peter's face reddened slightly. "Um, yeah."

"Huh."

Shit. This was the part where he had to shut it down because it was too risky, or too stupid, and Spider-Man could never have any fun ever in his life.

Then, "Here, I'll follow you."

He near dropped his phone. "What?"

"What? I'm not that old." He pouted, knowing full well that he was, in fact, that old.

Peter just gaped. He didn't even think about that — if he could get the Avengers to follow him, he'd be offical-offical. (Not that that mattered, but it very much mattered.)

He started gaining more and more followers, gaining a huge spike when Tony Stark, Pepper Potts and James Rhodes started following him. After that, people didn't doubt his legitimacy nearly as much. They even had a Twitter Moment about it, so you know that it's important news.

Peter couldn't be happier.

———

"Did you see the thing about Spider-Man having a Twitter?"

"Yeah but I don't think it's real. He's probably too busy for social media."

"I don't know. I mean Tony Stark follows him. And the videos look real. Have you seen them?"

"No?"

"Look at this, I'll show you."

———

"Holy shit! Spider-Man retweeted my drawing of him!"

———

"Spider-Man just tweeted 'big chungus' to his fourteen thousand followers. Skinny legend got me quaking."

———

"I fucking love Spider-Man's Twitter."

"Spider-Man's what?"

"Oh my god, you haven't seen? Look it up, it's hilarious."

———

"This is the quality content I like to see in a Twitter account."