feel something (analogical)

chapter eight

He stayed with me after. Logan, I mean. I don't know what happened to Roman but I didn't see him for a while after  ..that.. happened.. Im glad I didn't, really.

Um.. Logan came to my dorm and we stayed there for sometime. He told me I should stay at his dorm in case Roman decided to show up and take his rage out on me sometime into the night.

So I packed some clothes and my tooth brush in my laptop bag before we went to his dorm. I felt kind of self-conscous because the difference between our dorms were massive.

Mine was kind of cozy and messy and his was so clean. Everything was so perfectly placed and wiped clean that I wondered if he had ocd.

We spent the night talking and stuff. Scrolling through Tumblr and sharing light humor. And what's a sleepover without some venting?

I was crying, again. I was... I was worried for him. That maybe I had messed up and maybe That he was upset with me for what Roman did to him.
These things still eat up at me and sometimes I still stay up thinking about this.. This that happened a long time ago.

Um.. Sorry.. I'm getting off topic again... So what happened was he told me he was fine and that everything was going to be fine. I felt like it wasn't though. I never really had anything be normal or really good before I met him.

My friend Patton was probably the only one that made me feel a little better then I would usually be. And when I first met Roman I thought I was happy.

.. So then we got ready for bed around... Maybe 2am. We shared an unhealthy habit of staying up late.
We also both had a friend or two that told us before that we need to sleep. My friend being patton, his being someone named Joan.

He let me stay in his room while he stayed in the livingroom, and big shocker, I felt guilty about it. Because it's his  room.

He slept on the couch and I couldn't find myself tired. I did like the smell of him in the bed but even that didn't comfort me from my thoughts..

..Um..Sorry, that sounded kinda dark.

But it's what happened.

Eventually I grabbed the pillow and made my day to his livingroom. I had to look around a bit to find it but I did.

He was laying on the couch, his glasses were off and he looked even more at peace then he did usually. Besides the small fresh cuts in his lip and nose. He looked.. Peaceful.
Because there was something to him that said Logan when he was awake. He was more.. Stoic.. I guess.

I found myself staring for probably a few minutes before I placed the pillow besides his carefully.

I climbed in the couch next to him and got comfortable. There,  I felt his bodyheat and his.. Body, that made me feel.. Sort of, safe.
I don't really know what it was about him that made me feel kind of at ease..

Then I think I fell asleep.

So give me just enough to,

  Make me feel something, something