Friends Don't, But We Do

5. My Best Friend

I can't go more than a day leaving things with Nolan how I did at the club last night. I feel bad about bringing up Ty, knowing that he is already not too happy about that situation.

Chris brought me home last night but didn't stay over because he has to work today. We made out for a few minutes in his car, but nothing too crazy. I apologized about Nolan being cold towards him, but he only wanted me to assure him that we never dated and we were just friends- which I did easily.

Chris didn't really ask much about my oldest and closest friend after that, we mostly just talked about what's going on at our shared workplace.

Anyways, when I wake up this morning with a small headache and a lot of guilt, I call Nolan. He answers but doesn't say much so I ask him if I can go over to see him. He agrees, saying that his parents are both at work and he's the only one in the house for now.

I drive over quickly, arrive within a half hour, and knock. I never used to knock on this door. With the way I rushed over here, I didn't even think about being back in the old neighborhood. The house I grew up in is just down the block. My parents don't live there anymore.

My trip down memory lane is interrupted by Nolan opening the front door. I walk straight into him, hug him, and tell him that I'm sorry for what happened last night. He shrugs and lets go of me after only a second.

I sigh as I back away. "I really am sorry. I shouldn't have said that stuff about you and her and I-"

"Teagan," he interrupts, "it's fine. You're fine. It's not like you're wrong. I'm an idiot, I know that."

I sigh again and pull him over to the couch in the living room. We kissed on this couch once, but that's not important right now. We were sixteen, drunk. "You're not an idiot."

"Look," he interrupts again. I shut my mouth. "I know why I keep going back to Ty. There's an actual, real reason."

"Well what is it?"

"I think I ... I mean I know that..."

"Nolan just spit it out. Were you with some other girl in Philly this year? Did things end bad with her? Is that why you're back with Ty? Just tell me, I feel like I don't know anything about your life right now," I let out in a single breath.

"Kinda," he says. "I definitely have feelings for someone else, but I can't be with her... so I gotta get over it. And I don't know, hooking up with Ty gets my mind off this other girl."

So there was a girl this season... I knew it. I knew there had to be a reason he didn't call me as much the past nine months.

"Okay... why can't you be with this girl?" I don't know how to talk about this with him. He's only ever been hung up on Ty. He looks at me helplessly, so I figure maybe I should adjust my approach. "Well at least give me more details," I say happily. "Who's this girl? What's she like, where'd you meet? Maybe you don't know the whole story? We can maybe figure something out-"

"No, Teegs. There's nothing to figure out, okay?" He interrupts softly. "I mean, really, we don't have to talk about it."

I'm about to tell him that I don't mind, that I want to talk about it if it'll make him feel better. I want to help him with his problems, because I know that I'm the only person he'll go to with these kinds of issues.

But then the front door opens and in walks his mother. She must be home from work early. Nolan sighs next to me and then stands up from the couch. "Hey Mom, uh Teagan's here."

Mrs. Patrick looks our way and then quickly shuts the front door behind her and smiles widely. She always was such a warm and welcoming woman. "Oh Teagan, I haven't seen you in ages! Come here sweetie!" She exclaims and approaches me with wide open arms.

I stand up and meet her in the middle, letting her hug me and hug her back. When I was a teenager, I had the worst relationship with my mother... but Mrs. Patrick was always there for me.

"How is work? The lawyer world treating you good?"

I laugh and nod, saying that work is alright- as good as it could be considering I'm just a secretary. She scoffs when I downplay my work, saying they wouldn't be able to function without me. Always so supportive.

She tells us she'll make us lunch, which makes Nolan roll his eyes and say that he's not a little kid anymore. But I slap his arm and tell her that it would be great.

She ends up making us grilled cheese, which is kinda funny because we're twenty years old.

"So Teagan, has Nolan told you about his season yet? I've barely gotten a word out of him," she jokes and sits down next to me at their kitchen table.

I shake my head. "He hasn't said anything to me about it either," I agree. "Philly is like some secret world that I don't know anything about."

Nolan scoffs, a soft smile playing at his lips. "There's not really much to tell. You watch the games, I don't know what else you wanna know," he says nonchalantly.

His mom rolls her eyes at her son but drops the subject. She knows as well as anyone how to deal with her difficult son. "Ah what are we gonna do with him, Teagan?"

I giggle, reaching over to ruffle Nolan's hair and he slaps me away easily. "How come you guys always come after me when you're together?" He whines as we both laugh.

Truthfully, if his sisters were here it would be even worse for him. During our teenage years, I got as close with Maddie and Aimee as I was with Nolan. I always found myself over at the Patrick household, since my mother was rarely in a good mood, and the easiest way for me to bond with the girls was through poking fun at Nolan. He can handle it, always could.

"Stop whining, Nolan. You know we love you," I tell him with an amused grin. He looks over at me and smiles, showing his teeth for once and not saying something sarcastic like I would have expected.

Later, when day turned to night and we had driven something of 50 miles out of Winnipeg just out of pure boredom, I try to continue our conversation from earlier. But he really doesn't seem to wanna talk about it.

"Please just tell me what happened with this girl?" I plead and turn completely towards him from my place in the passenger seat. He shakes his head defiantly. "I feel like you haven't talked about a girl in forever, like someone who you actually like," I continue.

We're parked in a random parking lot, so he can't hide.

He rolls his head along the seat, until he's looking at me. His eyes look bored. "Teegs," he says, "She just doesn't feel the same way, okay?"

I furrow my eyebrows. I mean... how could a girl turn him down? He's the nicest person, the chillest guy... and he's definitely not ugly that's for sure. I've watched girls fawn over him for years, and usually he's payed them no mind.

"Are you sure?"

He raises his eyebrows and lets out an airy laugh. "Pretty sure."

"I mean... like what's the reason?"

He shrugs and shakes out his hair. "I don't know Teegs, we're just better as friends I guess. Now can we please talk about something else?"

I don't wanna make him upset or anything, and he asked nicely... so I agree. I sigh and look out the windshield. Wherever we are it's unfamiliar. "Where are we?" I ask.

"Looks like a park or something," Nolan mumbles. "Wanna explore it?"

With a shared look, we hop out of the car and start the adventure. It is a park, with a swing set and sandbox and monkey bars... the whole set up. It's too dark to build anything significant in the sand, but the monkey bars are a good way to compete with each other.

He goes much faster than I do. I can barely even hold myself up long enough to be honest.

We end up on the swings, get back into our old habits of conversation. It feels great, like there are no more barriers to our friendship. I only pray that the rest of the summer will be just as satisfying as this day and night together.

Life is so much better with my best friend.