Darth Minar

Chapter 18

Kanan had sunk to his knees, tears stung the backs of his eyes as two of his friends were at either shoulder.  At one side was Hera, her hand resting lightly on his shoulder in support.  He felt her fear, she didn't fully understand what he said, and neither did he.  

On the other side was Sabine, her hand gripping his shoulder so tight it was as if she was steadying herself.  He could feel her heart beating rapidly; practically pounding in out of her chest.  She had heard what he'd said clearly, clear as crystal.  But, she couldn't believe it.  

"What did you say, Kanan?"  Hera asked, swallowing hard.  Her voice cracked, unbelieving as she lifted her head to face where Ezra lay.  

He lay on a table, blood was slowly seeping from his head.  He was unconscious, but where his chest had previously been rising and falling in a semi-normal pattern it was now still.  No more breaths escaped his lips.  A pained expression stuck on his face, permanently.  He had died in a state of pain, of suffering.  In a place that wasn't his home around people that weren't hid family.  Something grasped Kanan's throat as hot tears began to pour down his face.  He couldn't see Ezra, but he could sense everything Hera was seeing.

"I can't sense him anymore."  Kanan said, his voice void of all emotion.  "He's dead."  

Kanan got to his feet slowly, his face blank, and he left the room.  Hera looked after him with a sad, longing expression.  Sabine ran forward to Ezra's bed, kneeling at the foot of it.  Zeb and Rex looked across the boy with sad expressions.  

"He was too young."  Hera whispered sadly, but everyone in the room had heard.  "And this is how he will be remembered?  Died a sith warrior after conquering at Rebel Base?  I don't think so.  Someone, begin CPR pronto!"  Hera's eyes now burned with a ferocity, she was going to save this boy.  

The world had been black, silent.  The ringing had stopped and Ezra was at peace, for the first time in almost a year.  Visions flashed before his eyes, memories he realized.  No, he thought, this cannot be the end.....

And then he was awake; bolting up with a jump in The Ghost with a relevant dizziness in his head.  He panted, breathing again.  A shocked Hera stood only inches away, a tear forming in the corner of her eye.  Squeezing his eyes closed, he move one hand to his core.  He ached, all over, and it took him nearly five minutes to catch his breath.  

Hera was the first to greet him; helping him to lie back down and stop the bleeding coming from his head.  The room was spinning, but he could see clearly the smile that lit up her eyes.  And the concerned glance that brought her back down from the clouds.  What was wrong?  Was she not happy to see him? 

No one said a word; fifteen minutes were spent in silence as his wounds were cleaned and he was distributed painkillers and sleeping medication.  He offered a small, quick smile before slipping, yet again, into unconsciousness.  The last thing he remembered were the faces that surrounded him as he came back to life, and the faces that didn't.  Hera, Sabine, Zeb, Rex, Chopper.  But Kanan was nowhere to be seen.  He didn't care....

When Ezra had been brought back by a miracle of Hera, everyone had begun to breathe with relief.  Ezra was home, alive and well, and he was going to be just fine.  Everyone important to him had seen the feat, except for the most important person in his life.  Everyone had glanced around with a nervousness, he had left moments before when he was convinced his young apprentice had died.  Everyone knew how much Ezra depended on Kanan, Kanan was the most important person in Ezra's life.  

It was Kanan's vote that got him a spot on the team, Kanan had saved his life more times than he could count.  Kanan had taken Ezra under his wing; trained him, been a master, sacrificed his eyesight for the young boy.  Ezra was never the same since.  Kanan had given himself to the Empire more than once for Ezra, and then Ezra again for Kanan.  Ezra had died.  But now, when Ezra was back, alive and well, Kanan was nowhere to be seen.  Hera knew who Ezra was looking for when he'd shot up, inspecting the room with and expression he hadn't shown in awhile, hope, and the look in his eyes when he couldn't see what he was looking for.  For the mere minutes he'd been awake again, he seemed different.  Older.

"Hera," Sabine's voice was hoarse when she finally spoke up.  Everyone had stood in silence for almost fifteen minutes.  "Hera, his eyes."  

And she was right.  His eyes weren't the same, and Hera wondered if they'd ever be again.  

They weren't golden or red, burning with a hatred so strong he could kill with glance.  

They weren't electric blue; a blue so strong and so filled with hope they could inspire the freedom of Lothal, a rebellion, a family.

They were gray; like a cloudy sky, like a dull day.  No emotion other than what skimmed the surface.  No hope, no light, no darkness.  It was as if the conflict within him had ended in a draw.  And it left him numb and dull.  It left him gray.  

Zeb had broken into a run after the room had eased back into awkward conversation.  He had to tell Kanan of the miracles that had occurred.  He rounded the corner; stopping breathless right in front of his bedroom door.

"Kanan!  Kanan, are you in there?"  Zeb called, knocking on the door forcefully.  The room inside was silent.  "Kanan!"  

"Zeb, I want to be alone right now."  Kanan said quietly with a sad tone, just loud enough for Zeb to hear.  

"Kanan, you need to come with me now."  Zeb said, his tone forceful.  "Ezra is alive."

The room inside had gone completely silent, even more silent than the silence that already plagued it.  A minute later the door opened, and Kanan stepped out.  He was silent, but Zeb knew what he wanted.  He nodded and led Kanan to the room. 

They never expected what they found. . .