He's Not Afraid || L.S AU

Chapter 13

Harry'sPOV

My mind goes blank and I think my heartbeat has stopped. It doesn't add up to the fact that I feel every bone in my body, how I inhale and exhale constrics my chest from allowing air in my lungs, the way my breathing is ragged and out of breath like I just competed in a marathon.

Louis is in a coma and it's...

"My fault" I whisper

"Harry! It is not you fault! Neither Louis or you caused this and I do not want to-"

"My fault, not it's m-my fault h-he's i-in a f-fucking coma! It's all my damn fault!" I stammer out, ignoring my mum completely.

"Harry, listen to me,"

"No! No! No! Just get out! Out!" I scream, balling my fist together and hitting the first thing I could reach. The lampshade falls to the ground with a loud crash.

"Harry, plea-"

"No! Get out! Please just get out.." I try to hold back tears and watch as she nods and scurries out the room in a hurry. Once I hear the click of the door shut close I sob into my hands, not giving a shit about my head anymore.

"I-It's a-al m-m-my f-fault!" I wail out, quickly wetting the bedding and thin sheets.

If it wasn't for me missing his road he wouldn't be here. If it wasn't for me not paying attention on the round about he wouldn't be here. If it wasn't for me trying to talk to him while driving we wouldn't be here. If it wasn't for meLouis wouldn't be here. I should be the one in a coma. I should be the one in the passenger seat when we were in the action. I should have protected him and I failed.

I sob and sob until my throat feels sore, cheeks red, eyes bloodshot and nose blocked.

"Harry?"

Looking up, Gemma stands in front of my closed door with her bag slung lazily around her shoulder and a sad smile plastered on her face.

"G-Gemma?"

She sighs, running to me and dumping her back on the chair beside me. I start to cry into her arm/shoulder once she's wrapped her warm arms around my body.

"Shhh it's going to be okay Haz. My poor baby bro.." she rubs her hand on my back, soothing my cries that has turned into hiccups in the mixture.

"Now, want to tell me why you are in the hospital?" Gemma pulls away from the embrace slightly, sitting down on the bed when I've scotched a little for her to sit once I've made space for my older sister.

"D-Didn't m-mum t-tell you?"

Gemma just shakes her head in reply. "She said that you will tell me. And from the looks of it, it must of been something terrible as you are crying your eyes out in front of me"

I start to quickly wipe my face with my hands and sniff.

"M-Me and Louis were in my c-car and driving to his place. I m-missed his road and t-turned for the round about. I wasn't focused on my driving causing u-us to have c-collided." I explain hiccuping in the process.

"You're okay though," Gemma furrows her eyebrows together in confusion.

"No I'm not. I feel every bit of pain coursing through my body" I say.

"Why?"

"Because I'm the one who put Louis in a coma!" I exclaim. Gemma's has drops with eyes widening doing so. "What? How?"

"It's my fault. If I wasn't so distracted he wouldn't be in a coma. I-I should be the one in it, not h-him!" I cry out to Gemma.

"Bro, you are talking shit. If this Louis guy was awake he wouldn't want to hear those words come out of your mouth now will he?"