Rated X Imagines

Difficult Life || Mini Story

Diggy's POV

She sighed immensely, but gave me a soft grin. It's hurting her inside. To know that I gave up that part of my virginity. If I knew that one day we would be back together, I would've never done it. Y/n should know I would never do that. Right?

Once she got out I waited until she was all the way inside the house, before leaving.

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The Next Morning

"Baby, can we talk?" Jessica said coming in our room. I guess she figured I was still mad at her so she went to sleep on the couch.

"Sure. What about?"

"What did you do when you dropped off that girl?" I'm assuming this is the part where I tell her I'm in love with my ex. "We talked, and I decided to take her back."

I don't know whether it was what I said, or the fact that I'm breaking up with her. All I know is that she went off.

"So you're leaving me for some wannabe crackhead? What about us? Huh! What about those times that you said you loved me. Do I mean nothing to you? Was our relationship a joke?! Answer me!" The pigment of her skin turned from fair to extremely red. I should've known she wouldn't take rejection lightly.

"She's not a wannabe crackhead. You don't know her so you have no reason to say anything. And I'm pretty sure I've said 'I love you' more times to her than I have to you. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, but I'm telling you straight up that I'm in love with someone else. Now I know you have a house to go to; and I know that it's your own. That's where you need to be headed."

"Fine, I didn't want your small dick anyway." She sneered.

I smirked a little on the inside. All those times she said I was the best she ever had, now she wants to say I have a little dick.

While getting up, I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. Y/n. Damn it's only six in the morning. And a Sunday. Who gets up this early on a Sunday? Oh wait, I'm up.

"Hello." The light outside was a dim setting. The sun just started to peek into the sky.

"Good morning. What are you doing?" She sounded kind of off. I'll get to the bottom of that in a second. "I'm thinking why Jessica said I had a small dick and stormed out, and wondering why my baby sounds like something is wrong with her."

"I don't want to talk about it." A light sob was present at the end. What's going on? "Y/n, tell me what is going on with you."

"I just had a nightmare. I'm not usually up this early. I just wanted to hear your voice. It soothes me."

"Can you tell me what the dream was about?"

"It felt so real. We were getting married and stuff happened in between, then you called it off and ran off in the sunset with Jessica." Why would she think I would do that? "That doesn't sound real at all. You and I both know that I would never do that. I love you too much."

She took a one minute pause, before speaking again.

"You..... You yelled and screamed and called me a murderer. Telling me I killed our baby. Telling me that I was a whore for being a prostitute. Saying I was nothing but trash........ I'm sorry Diggy. I didn't want to abort our baby. Don't hate me, please don't hate me. I'll stop being a prostitute for you. We can try again for a baby. And another. Just.... Please say you'll stay. I'm so sorry."

I heard light snoring. She fell asleep, and was talking. "Baby. Y/n wake up for me precious." Her cries got louder and all I could do was listen.

"I love you. I never stopped. What can I do to prove it?! I'll kill myself for you. Just to make you happy. Just please don't be mad at me."

"Y/n, wake up." Another girl said from the other line. I'm guessing it was her friend Fiji. "Hello. I'm sorry, I must've dozed off for a second." What kind of torture is she feeling inside? Why does she think I would leave her? I never left, we were forced to be separated. If her dad wasn't a police officer we would've still been together, just sneaking around.

"Baby, I love you. You know I would never do that right? It's just a dream. I'm gonna pick you guys up in two hours okay, so can you be ready for me?" My voice quivered, no matter how hard I tried to contain it.

"Yes."

"That's a good girl. Alright see you then."

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Y/n's POV

"Y/n, are you okay? I've only seen you like this the first night you came here. What's with you and him?" Fiji asked sitting next to me.

"I don't know what to call it anymore. I guess it's more of an eternal love situation, I'm deeply in love with a man that I got separated from by my father. Then he gives someone his making love virginity, something that was destined to me and me only. My heart just feels complete when he's around me. But when he's not, I can't sleep. I can't eat."

"You must really love him. I wish I had someone like that."

"It's not that simple. You have to experience true heartbreak to even consider it love. He doesn't understand how low I was in life, without him. Being there to protect me, or just being here in general. It hurt excruciatingly."

"How do you cope with that? Knowing the one you love is out there, but you can't have him."

My heart clenched. I didn't even want to bring up anything like that. Not having him, but knowing he was out there and that he once loved me tore me down. It made me feel that life wasn't meant for living anymore. Just surviving.

I just need to distance myself from actually getting attached again. He won't like that, but what other choice do I have? I'm broken. And he knows that. I don't want him to get back with me when I'm broken. I need to fix myself, and he has to except that.

"I didn't. I still till this day can't cope or hinder the fact that I couldn't have him. He's my life." I whispered the last sentence to myself. Realizing that fate had set it's course just for me and him, just with gigantic obstacles forming in between.

I packed all of my stuff last night. I don't know if it was my eagerness just to be close to him again, or knowing that I could finally get my life back on track.

"So, are you gonna stop?" Fiji asked finishing her suitcase. We didn't have much, when you're a druggie all you needed was something to wear. No fashion statement had to be made. All that matters was the high you felt.

"I told myself I would, I'm just not sure. It's an addiction you know. I can't just automatically quit Candy, that's like me saying I'm going to wake up one day and decide that I'm going to become a vegetarian. It doesn't work. We promised each other we would stop and to all ends I do keep my promises. But I'm going to fail. It may be next month or maybe even the next day, we just have to be there for one another. Regardless."