LOVE SICK : The Chaotic Lives of Blue Shorts Guys

Chapter 16 : AIN'T ONLY US

I'm allowing the other party to do as he desires, but it isn't only his but my own desires too. I stop caring about all the reasons, and all the consequences.

Phun's kiss is a fearful but an emotional one,  just like how he is embracing me. The two of us let our bodies do what our hearts are craving for. We're at a point where we can no longer keep these feelings inside. There's no stopping us.

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I'm not sure how long the time has passed when I finally open my eyes to the darken room. I've come to my senses once again. Phun is holding me tightly as he sleeps. Phun, this friend that has caused so much turmoils inside my head over the past few days.

I can see his sleeping face thanks to the moonlight that is shining through. His long lashes are caressing his cheeks, his eyelids are hiding the eyes which were burning me up merely a few hours ago.

I can tell by the his stable breathing from his nose right above his natural colored lips, that the person holding me is in a deep slumber.

I stare at his face with mixed emotions. But the one feeling that is standing out to me the most is fear.

The pain which I can still feel is reminding me that we have made an unforgivable mistake. I was the one who told him to ignore all the reasons, to stop thinking about what the right things might be, and that we should forget who we're supposed to be. But after a few hours, I begin to realize that those things I mentioned simply can't be done.

The things that have been haunting Phun are now haunting me as if I had read a chain letter. I'm facing the reality of what Phun said to me, the reality of which I cannot escape. Phun and I are both guys. We each have a girlfriend of our own. And more importantly, we are good friends and I do not want to destroy the relationship that we have between us.

Personally, I don't know what kind of feelings I have for Phun. Phun himself doesn't know what kind of feelings he is giving to me either. I don't dare to think back to how all of this started.

I'm scared that this only happened out of lust.

But there's something else that I'm even more afraid of.

I'm scared that it might be more than just lust. More than a simple attachment we have for one another. More than just a mistake that we accidentally made. I'm scared that this means more than all those things.

Because if my heart takes that step over the edge, I don't know how I'll be able to deal with that. I honestly don't.

"Oh...Noh? You're not asleep?" Fortunately, Phun's voice interrupts my train of thoughts. He's yawning so wide that I need to move away a bit since I start to feel really hot.

But Phun only gives me a tiny bit of space between his arms. It seems he wants to keep holding me like this. " ########## it, it's hot."

"What? Then I'll turn the A/C up." What a smartass. He reaches over to grab the remote control and adjusts the temperature so that he doesn't need to let go of me. Doesn't he even think about global warming? I shoot him an annoyed look, but the room is probably too dark for him to see. Phun tenses his arms and stretches a bit before he pulls me back inside his embrace.

"Wanna drop by your house to get the stuff you need for school tomorrow morning?" He mutters a question to me like someone who is too lazy to open their mouth to speak.

"Sure."

There's a change in my voice which he picks up on. "Is something the matter?" He asks me, now fully awake.