Troubled

First Day Fears

"What...I..." I couldn't get my words out, it was impossible. How could he be here? Why was he here? And more importantly why was I still standing in front of him? I didn't even want to look at him after all he'd put me through.

"Mara...Hi...I had no idea...It- ...It's great to see you" He began.

My breath caught in my throat as I felt tears in my eyes, I couldn't decide whether I was angry or upset. "Great to see me? How dare you even think of saying something like that! After all you've done..." I couldn't continue as the words failed to come from my mouth. It was clear to me now that I was overwhelmed with anger. He opened his mouth like he was about to speak but I began again before he had chance to defend himself.

"You know, I spent the whole summer crying, wishing I had someone that would just be there for me, to have a shoulder to cry on. I called you like 20 times and you never once picked up! Not even a single text message, no nothing! And I won't even mention the first week back at school! You can't even imagine what it felt like to go through that on my own! To not have someone there with me, I mean sure I could take care of myself but that's not the point! I called again in the first week, just wishing that when I arrived at school one of the days I'd see you waiting in the car park, but you never showed Alex! We were best friends and you made me feel completely worthless" I yelled at him, tears overflowing from my eyes. There weren't many people in the huge library anyway, but the people that were in there were staring at the situation happening between the new girl and the guy she apparently had history with.

It wasn't long before Alex spoke again. The annoying thing was that I could tell by the look on his face he wasn't speaking because he wanted to - it was simply because he felt like he needed to but right now I didn't want to hear it.

"Mara, I'm sorry ok? I'm sorry, I didn't mean for you to feel that way!" He yelled back at me, clearly trying his hardest to get the message across to me.

"It's a bit too late for sorry Alex... don't you think?" I questioned him.

"I said I'm sorry Mara!" He replied.

"That doesn't change how you made me feel and what I went through, Alex! It's too little too late" I said.

"Mara..." He began just as I had turned to walk away.

"Save it!" I yelled as I turned on my heels and ran for the door. The tears were falling harder and faster as I heard Lisa calling my name. I reached the double doors and threw them open, running through the hang out area, ignoring the stares I got as I headed for the stairs down to my floor. I ran along my corridor. Reaching my room , I found it hard to unlock the door, as it was hard to see where I was putting the key card because of the tears blurring my vision.

When I finally opened the door I ran and practically collapsed on my bed, still crying. Alex really had hurt me. He was supposed to be my best friend and he'd just left me, all on my own to deal with that horrible accident. When I looked at my phone I realised it was 9:45pm and I was so tired, so I just decided to stay where I was and fall asleep.

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When I woke up the next morning, I looked at my phone and checked the time. It was 6am breakfast was at 7 till 8. I was so jet-lagged it was unreal and after last nights events, the last thing I wanted to do was anything but school work.

I got out of bed and realised that I hadn't yet got my uniform. Great. I'd have to go and see Lisa and I guess we weren't exactly on the best terms after who she decided to introduce me to last night.

I finally decided to go down and see her as I'd have to face everyone throughout the day at some point - though I wished I didn't have to. I threw on my skinny jeans and a vest and headed down to the reception, praying I wouldn't see Alex on my way.