Love of Mars

Chapter 11

Throttle liked quiet. Not the kind of quiet that came after a fight, when the air still smelled like smoke and laser fire and everyone was checking for injuries. Not the kind of quiet in the middle of the night when he couldn't sleep and the memories of Mars crept in.

This was different.

This was water moving gently against the shore. Wind in the trees. Vinnie and Charley arguing somewhere behind him. Modo laughing at something dumb.

Normal quiet. Like before the war. Like they had enjoyed once before.

He sat on the small pier at the edge of the lake sipping a root beer, his glasses hiding where his eyes kept drifting.

To her. Always back to her.

Stella was floating on her back in the water, hair spread out, eyes closed. He didn't think he'd ever seen her this relaxed apart from when she was asleep. Not that he watched her sleep, that would be weird and creepy. But she'd slept around him often enough for him to see her in that relaxed state. Great, now he was justifying himself to his own thoughts...

After the kidnapping, after seeing her strapped to that table, barely able to stand...
He still saw that sometimes when he closed his eyes. He didn't like how angry that made him.

Actually, that wasn't true.

He did like it. He just didn't like what it meant.

He finished the beer before slipping back into the water, barely noticing the cold anyore. He already knew he liked her. That wasn't the problem. The problem was that he didn't know when it had happened... Somewhere hidden in the little moments his walls had crumbled without him realising.

She was tough. A genius to be sure. Stubborn. Brave. Annoying sometimes.

He liked all of that. Which was a problem. Because then there was Carbine. He leaned back slightly in the water, watching Stella talk to Charley and splash Vinnie when he got too close. Carbine wasn't just some old girlfriend. She was a soldier. A partner. Someone he'd fought a war with. Someone he'd thought he might spend the rest of his life with once Mars was free. 

But the war dragged on. They were on different missions. Different planets. Different priorities.

And when they'd last seen each other, it hadn't been a clean breakup. No clear ending. Just too many things unsaid and both of them too stubborn to say them. So technically, he wasn't with Carbine anymore. But it didn't feel completely finished either. And now there was Stella.

He watched her laugh at something Vinnie said, then immediately shove him underwater. She looked over toward Throttle for a second and caught him looking. She didn't look away right away. Just gave him a small smile. His stomach did something very stupid at that exact moment.

He looked away first.

Great, he thought. Leader of the Freedom Fighters. Can fight Plutarkians, giant robots, and Limburger... but one hot scientist in a swimsuit and I'm done for.

He rubbed the back of his neck and sighed quietly. He didn't know if she liked him the same way. She joked with him, argued with him, trusted him... but that didn't mean anything for sure. And the last thing he wanted was to make things weird. The garage worked because they were a team. A family. If he got this wrong, it could mess everything up.

Modo suddenly swam over beside him.
"You keep starin' at her like that, she's gonna notice," he said casually.

Throttle didn't even look at him. "I don't know what you're talkin' about."

Modo snorted. "Uh huh." Throttle sighed. "It's Carbine, huh?" Throttle nodded slightly.

Modo was quiet for a moment. Then he said,

"You can care about what you had with Carbine and still care about someone else. Ain't illegal, bro. You deserve to be happy." When Throttle didn't answer right away Modo carried on, "Just talk to her, man. We can't be having another Vinnie/Charley situation in the family."

"What's that mean?"

"Always dancing 'round their feelings. It's so obvious they like each other. They just haven't done anything about it yet."

"That we know of." Modo snorted a laugh.

"Yeah, well, things would be better if they just came out and said things. I think it'll be the same for you guys too."

Across the lake, Stella was walking back toward the shore, sunlight reflecting off her wet skin. Fuck what a bombshell. He'd have to thank Charley some day for packing that bikini...

Throttle watched her for a long moment.

"Yeah, maybe" he said finally.