rose epidemic

drenched.

tord.
its..been a week since matt died.
god you honestly remember it so vividly-

yelling, screaming, punching.
you hated eachother.
you begged him to kill himself.
you were wishing he would but you just were not expecting him to-
to-
grab that fucking kitchen knife and

and plunge it through his ribcage.
you...
felt so much all in that one instant.
all you could think to do was rush to him and try to help.
then you felt like a hypocrite-
why are you worried about him?
this is what you wanted.
all your plans will be simpler without him.
you were begging him for so long.
and now that it happened right in front of you so suddenly -
your heart just...dropped..
you pulled the knife out and stabbed him repeatedly.
making sure his limp body was surely dead- as well as getting all of your rage and hatred out.
the things he did and the way he acted just made you so sick.
hes been gone since it all started.
he was already dead.
he just needed to make it official.
it was so sudden.
it replays every night inside of your head.
it disgusts you.
all you can think of is the words he said the night he proposed.

"youre my sun. my everything"

would the sun really betray his world like that?
his earth?
his rosebud?
his plant?
his life?
his heart?
his youth?
his-

his love?

you never really thought you loved him and denied it all over again- until he died.
all you wanted to do was kiss his dead body-
it disgusts you.

you were in a panic.
when you stabbed him-
you could hear edd vomit behind you.
tom dragged you out and pinned you down as edd called the cops.
now you sit in your cell.

waiting for the day they decide your last day will be.

matt did put up a fight you cant lie- but it wasnt enough.
he tried to fight.
he tried his best but he was gone.
far far gone.

it was almost easy.

and now here you are.
awaiting death.
a felon.
red leader.
an army leader.

youre not a hero.
youre not honorable.
you did all of this for your army.
just to get fucking caught and imprisoned in the end.
just to die to the strangles of a rope.

you chose this, so people could really, truly see what evil looks like.

you want them to know.
you cannot trust anyone.
no one.
all you feel in the end is pain.
all you pray for is a lie.
all you deserve is hatred.

you, tord larsson,

are a convicted felon and murderer.
you, tord larsson, will die today.
for stabbing your fiancé to death, multiple times.
the man you swore to love several times and promised the best to.
the man who put all his confidence, trust, and want into you.
the man who would easily rather die than lose you.
but unfortunately you just couldnt handle that, huh?
you couldnt wait 70 years?
you wanted him dead from the beginning, is that right?

and you got what you wanted.
and you have to pay the consequences.

tord larsson, red leader, whoever the hell you were,

i truly hope, you rest in piece.

"i am sorry.
i truly am, my sunshine."

you,
tord larsson,
are dead.