The Great YouTuber Slash Fiction

Chapter 9: Dathan - Remembering Sundae

Originally posted February 12, 2018 to AO3      

"Thanks for letting me stay, Nate, especially, on such short notice." You and Dan grab his luggage from your trunk. "Without you, I'd be fucked." Dan had previously been staying in a hotel, but due to an idiot messing up using a microwave, the hotel he'd been staying at had been set on fire. Luckily, no one was seriously hurt.

"Oh it's fine, man. I'm always here for a friend." You need the company, with your recent breakup... no, no, you're not going to think about it, no... "Where's Phil?" Good, a nice subject change. He tells you, but you're not paying attention, instead just trying to keep composure. Don't cry, don't cry, you're almost over it, you chant in your head as you show Dan where everything he needs is.

It's only when you've gone to your room that you let anything out.

And in the evening, around an acceptable time for dinner, you clean yourself up and emerge from your room. You find that Dan's fallen asleep on your couch. Jet lag must be messing him up. He looks like a statue: still and silent. His mouth is slightly open. He looks kind of cute this way, is your first thought.

Your second thought is to cover his face in whipped cream. The angel in you says this is no way to treat guests. Your devilish side is already shaking the whipped cream.

You start by aiming for the mouth; making in look frankly inappropriate, then add some dollops to the forehead, which still looks very sexual. You add more to the rest of his face, only pausing for breaks when you try not to laugh.

For your finale, you add a cherry and some sprinkles. You consider adding some chocolate sauce, but decide that would be too cruel, and besides, you've clearly shown you've committed to this enough.

You go back to your room, bringing back a healthy, balanced meal of sundae to eat while you do stuff that actually counts as work.

At 9:38 you hear noise. "WHAT THE FU--"

You fall off your chair laughing so hard, you don't even hear Dan coming until he comes into your room, still partially covered in whip cream and holding something in his left hand.

"So," he towers over you, "I get the feeling that Nate wants to battle."

"No!" You cry between laughs, curling up in self defense.

He sprays you while screaming at the top of his lungs. You try to get away, adjusting yourself into a running position and fleeing the room, though not completely clean. But Dan comes after you, yelling British insults, still shooting. His aim's not great, and a lot of it ends up on your walls and floor.

When you slide into the kitchen, you grab the chocolate sauce. Dan comes quickly afterwards, but now you are also armed.

"Hey, motherfucker! Look at me now!" You taunt as you open the sauce.

"Oh shut up! You're the one that started this!"

"And now, I'm gonna be the one that ends it," you squirt the the brown substance into his hair.

"Heheh, Poophead."

"Goddammit, that's disgusting-- I might be Poophead, but you're the real piece of shit," he dumps the sprinkles down your back. Most of them stay in your hoodie, but you can feel some fall into your pants. But don't have time to worry about that now. Your only concern right now is escaping the wrath of he who is not on fire.

Unfortunately, you don't make it far out of the kitchen. You slip on some whipped cream and your back hits the wall.

"Ha! You're cornered!"

"No, no, no, spare me! Show some mercy!"

"Not likely." He shakes the can, ignoring your screams of protest. You shut your eyes and brace yourself.

You hear a cackle, then, a sputtering noise. You don't feel anything but a few drops.

"Oh fucking--not now!" He whines, now that he's defenseless.

You smirk, stepping towards him. He shrieks and runs, but not before you drizzle him a little.

Instead of chasing after him, you take a few steps before tucking yourself behind a corner and waiting.

It takes a few moments for Dan to realize you aren't following him any longer. He stops. Then tries to come back towards you, as quietly as possible, but you still hear his socks making contact with the floor. He passes by your spot unknowingly, until you inform him with a quick burst of chocolate.

Dog whistles wish they could be that high-pitched.

You leap at him, knocking both of you to the floor, where both of you become a tangle of limbs on the floor. Your faces are only an inch apart, leading to an awkward moment of silence. You stare into his bright brown eyes as his face turns from frustration to joy.

"You win, babe." He leans in closer to lick a bit of whipped cream of your nose. You respond by licking some chocolate off his cheek. Not knowing what else to do, you imitate the move, licking up some cream on his cheek, which he responds to by licking your chin, moving his tongue upwards and licking your lips. When he goes in for the kiss, it's soft, and tastes like sugar. You pull away before the point of no return, not wanting to regret anything that could happen next, but feel worse for stopping.

It being to late now, you go to clean up in the bathroom. A shower and a clean set of pj's gets rid of the sexy bukkake look, then you leave the bathroom to your guest, before you get rags and proceed to clean up the mess.

"Let me help, it's half my mess," The voice from behind startles you.

"You're the guest. You aren't supposed to clean."

"Well, you're not supposed to cover your guests in whipped cream while they sleep, either." Dan retorts. He's got you there. You throw him the floor cleaner. You make small talk, trying to fill the vacant silence, in an active effort not to overthink anything.

"I'd like to thank Mr. Clean for removing the sticky white stuff from my wall," you joke. "Mr. Clean is always there for me when I need a helping hand for a good rubbing. I like to smash him against the wall." Dan gives you a disapproving look, although he's clearly stifling a giggle.

"Oh, he's not that good. Look, he missed a spot." He points at somewhere, but you don't see anything. "There's something on your wall."

"What? Where on the wall--" You ask, right before being pushed against it. Dan comes closer to you.

"It's you." He smirks sexily.

You know what he wants. And maybe, you want it too. You cup his face, and move your mouth towards his ear. "Promise that you'll never tell anybody about what's happened tonight," you whisper.

"I promise." he whispers back.