your pov
"y/n ah!" your bestest friend hoseok screamed from the end of the hallway. instead of replying to him you decide to be quiet as if nobody is calling you. you have this feeling whenever you're being near him.
the feeling of love; where you feel like there's a butterflies in your stomach, where you often blush in little things that he did, where you would be flustered easily. you are to afraid to confess, especially because he has a crush on someone else.
im ha young; the most popular girl at school. but unlike in other school, she isn't a type of person who basically date every boy at this school. she isn't a type of person who likes to show off about their popularity and just do what they wanted. mayhe that's the reason why hoseok has a crush on her.
"y/n, why aren't you greet me back?" he whined while clinging into you. you just keep quiet, again you felt this feeling. those butterflies inside your stomach.
"i'm okay hoseok." you sighed while looking at him. "i need some privacy, i need to go." you sid and start walking away from him. you went to your class and take a sit on your seat beside ha young in front of hoseok.
"hey y/n!" she greeted you happily while showing her beautiful, perfect smile. "hello ha young" you said and forced a smile.
"can i tell you something? but please don't tell anyone." she said
timeskip
you have just got back from school, you keep thinking about what ha young said to you. it hurts you, but somehow it makes you kinda happy too. you laid on your bed staring into space thinking about how you should confess to HIM.
you have decide that you will confess to hoseok tommorow. you really think that it is nessecarry for hoseok to know about your feelings for him. you have just decide that you will simply told him. why should you make a plan about making it great when he won't accept your love.
next day
this is it; the day where you're going to confess to him. you nervously walk in to your class and see hoseok and ha young sitting next to each other. you walked to them and said "uhm, hoseok? can i talk to you?" you asked and pull hoseok outside.
"what's wrong y/n?" he questioned. "i have to told you something." you said nervously.
"oh, me too!" he said cheerfully, you know what is he going to tell you but you just stay quiet.
"let's said it together, shall we?" hoseok said still smiling widely. "sure" you forced a small smile.
"i-i like you hoseok!"
"i am dating ha young!"
he said it; the least thing that you wanted to hear. tears start to brim on your eyes and you don't hold them. they just rolling down your cheeks continously not stopping at all.
"y-y/n? i-i'm sorry" he stuttered and leave you alone in the middle of the hallway. you don't even think about going back to class, all you wanted to do is just crying and staying at your bed all day.
you ran back to your house while tears still running down your cheeeks. once you're arrived, you run to your bedroom and jump on your bed burrying your head to your pillow. you keep crying; well you can't even stop.
after some minutes; you finally got up from bed and went to the bathroom. you walk inside going to wash your face when you see a razor on the sink. you used to have depression and you have always cut yourself. but you stopped that habit after you met hoseok.
he finds out that you have been cutting yourself and he is litterally mad. he told you to stop and you stopped, just for him. unknowingly, you take that razor blade and press them against your skin. you hissed in pain but for you it is pleasureable.
you keep cut your wrist untill there's atleast more than ten self harm scars. you drop the razor blade and just stare into space.
what you don't know is that is the las day you're going to meet hoseok. right after that day, your parents and you are moving to other country for their bussiness.
i'm alive:D
YOU ARE READING
bts angst
Fanfic[ angst ] ; ; a feeling of deep anxiety or dread, typically an unfocused one about the human condition or the state of the world in general. on hiatus!
