"Not so long ago, I was alone and lost and then you came along and I was home. thank you for finding me
After 10 years of disappearing, when Ember Helberg returns to India to meet his childhood crush, Arorhea Laghari, he discovers that she has compl...
"You must be so happy Loraine Helberg doesn't hate you anymore," Jessica lay on Rhea's bed while Rhea sat before a canvas, painting something. "He does," Rhea said. "You told me he smiled at you," "That was a sarcastic smile. He was looking down on me,"
"Why?" "Isn't it obvious? It's because I'm Indian," "Did he say that?" "...No," They both looked at each other, "I'm such an idiot," Rhea shook her head.
Loraine stood formally dressed up in a black suit. Maple stood beside him in casuals as they heard the preceding performance in the background; A loud piano, echoing through the halls. Loraine pressed his palms over his ears and tapped his feet. "Move with the music, Loraine. Become one with it,"
He opened his green eyes and moved his hands away from his ears, hearing the loud claps in the hall outside. "Good luck, bror!" Maple smiled and hugged him "Ember didn't come?" Loraine asked. "Well, he told me he'd be here but..." "After that girl again, huh?" Maple looked down. Loraine took a sigh and walked towards the stage, "Whatever,"
He walked towards the piano and sat in front of it. He looked at the audience, looking around the room full of unfamiliar faces. Suddenly, he saw his father sitting in the front seat. No one dared sit beside him, so all seats surrounding him were empty. He had crossed his arms and his icy-blue eyes looked at Loraine sceptically. He brought her fingers over the keys and looked gently at the piano, 'You didn't come...'
He pressed the keys into the piano, making a pleasant sound. Soon, his body gave in to the music and his fingers were doing what they were supposed to. But his mind, it was elsewhere.
People... People are so strange. People who try to help you, people who don't understand how you feel. If they just listened, if they just sat back and didn't tell you what you're doing wrong. Anything that's hurting you, you are the one to pull yourself out of it, people can be there, people can support you. But in the end, only you can save yourself, it all depends on you.
And what if you not strong enough to do that?
"Everyone is strong enough to do that," He heard and closed his eyes, visualising his twin brother when he first met him. Skinny and long, with an IV drop beside him, wearing hospital clothes. He looked much older than he was, why was he going through all this? What was the point when the chances of him surviving were too less? Why hang on to life when it gives you nothing but pain? Why don't you put yourself out of this ordeal?
"Nowadays people are losing the purpose of life," Eleven years old Ember replied, "When we live in lies about life for too long, our soul gets sick and we think of death as the only escape. But is it? It seems very interesting to me, that 3000 years ago people didn't have these problems, because they believed this energy world exists but now people act like they are bigger than the universe, they think good medicine can fix this... but if that was true why don't antidepressants help people? Why are there so many sick people on this planet? And the situation seems to just keep getting worse."
Meanwhile, Ember ran on the footpath, dodging all the people and quickly got into the performance hall. He was breathing heavily, balancing himself against the wall with his right hand and pressing his stomach with his left. Loraine was still playing.
"I bet you have some fears...about dying, about people and thoughts. But you are not your brain, you are every cell of your body. And the soul is like fuel. It gives you the energy to live, to exist. And that is what this society forgot. To do and think what feels good, because emotions never lie...Besides, I have some promises to keep,"
Loraine stopped, the piece was over, the last chords had been struck. Everyone clapped, he looked over at the audience. In the dark, he could see those pale, skinny hands and golden hair, deep blue eyes, Ember was clapping too while standing at the door. Loraine looked back at the piano.
The day his grandmother died, his father came to England to pick him up. Everything was packed and he was ready to leave. Everything was still draped in black, his grandmother's grave was still blooming with flowers of regret when he left. All he had in his hand was his mother's diary. He met Maple after eight long years of mental and physical abuse. It felt eerie, he looked like a mirror image. A doppelganger. The trauma had changed him, and Maple realised it immediately. Everything around him was suddenly colourful and symphonies he hadn't heard before submerged him in themselves. But something was missing.
"Where's Ember?" Maple's jumped from the sofa, "Wanna meet him?" "He doesn't live with you?" So, he's excluded too? The next thing he could remember was being in a huge hospital, standing before this skinny and pale boy, who held an IV drop stand beside him, "Oh Loraine, you've grown tall too!" Contrary to his surroundings, he was bubbly. Loraine couldn't understand, they went through the same, then why did he turn out this way?
Loraine sat in front of his old piano with his music sheets and began playing. Mr Helberg heard him and came into his room, "What is this horrible sound?" He asked and Loraine stopped abruptly. His fingers shivered. "Such a dirty thing inside a luxurious mansion like this is an insult to my success,"
"Father, this is grandma's final gift to me," Loraine said. "You want a piano, right? I will get you a new one. Sam, get rid of this thing before it annoys me any further," Everything that connected me to you, is gone.
. . .
Loraine got up from his chair and looked at Ember, standing amongst the audience. He bowed gracefully, 'This is making me uncomfortable,
Ember is smiling, with his eyes, his lips, his heart. Things are different now, we are drifting apart and I don't know how to fix it. You're becoming closer to other people while I'm just sitting here, watching the world go by without me. I don't know what to do, it hurts. I hope this is just another melodramatic phase of yours, and you get over this mad obsession, this country and that girl. Because if not, I won't know what to do.'
-To be continued
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