Why? (Under Revision)

Regret

James' POV

After finishing up with Grace I rejected her knowing that she would never be a good mate. I watched her cry as she got herself decent before getting out of my room. My room still smelled of what we had done and I enjoyed the sent that lingered on the bed. I had a splitting headache from Xavier trying to break through the block I made so I wouldn't listen to him while I had my fun. I groaned as the pain seemed to grow with each passing second and I couldn't take it anymore. I let my block down and was met with a very angry Alpha wolf.

HOW DARE YOU! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU FUCKING IDIOT HUMAN! I winced at his voice that made my hand pound.

Would you calm down? You're giving me a headache.

NO I WILL NOT CALM DOWN. YOU DID THAT TO OUR MATE THEN REJECTED HER.

Calm down wolf she wasn't worth it she's not fit to be our Luna. She's an omega that makes her worthless and not suited for us.

She's not the one who is worthless. YOU ARE. He seethed. Then retreated to the back of my mind putting up a block between us. I tried to reason with him but he remained at the back of my mind ignoring anything that I was saying. I sighed and got up before walking out of my room and downstairs to grab something to eat. Once I was in the kitchen I bumped into Chloe who was wearing a too short skirt and a barely there top.

"Well hi there Alpha." She said putting her manicured hands on my chest and slowly moving them down to my abs.

"What do you want Chloe?" I asked uninterested by what she was doing. She was nothing compared to Grace. Shocked by what I just thought of I knew that I needed to get rid of her memory out of my head. Before Chloe could answer I grabbed her neck and roughly pulled her mouth toward mine and kissed her. She returned the kiss with a fury of her own as I pulled her closer to me and bend down to grab behind her legs so she could jump up. She wrapped her legs around my waist and I took us to one of the bathrooms near the kitchen since I didn't care where we were.

I kicked the door open and placed her on the counter before locking the door behind us. I looked at her as she panted and started to take off her clothes. I came closer and fucked her roughly not caring who heard and if she was in pain. I looked at her only to see Grace's face I was so shocked I backed away from her body. I started panting not understanding why I was picturing Grace underneath me when she was supposed to mean nothing to me. I turned around trying to take deep breaths and get the memories of what I did to her out of my head. I was pulled out of my thoughts when I felt a hand on my back.

"What's wrong baby." Chloe said in her obnoxious nasally voice.

"Leave." I said in a cold voice.

"What?" She said in disbelief.

"I said LEAVE." Using my Alpha command making her run out of the bathroom clutching her clothes In her hands. Sighing I walked out of the bathroom to go up to my room and lay down thinking about what I did to her. After a while of contemplating about what I should do I decided to go and talk to her. I walked toward her room up in the attic and knocked on her door.

"Grace is it okay if we talk?" I asked but got no respond. "Grace I know that what I did was wrong and I want to apologize for my actions I hope that we can work out what happened and become actual mates." Still no response but this time I realized that there was not heartbeat coming from her room and her scent was barely there. My heart dropped and I hoped that she was in there and not what I was thinking. I opened her door and was met with a cold empty room. It was as if she hadn't been in here for a few hours now.

"No, no, no." I mumbled to myself before sending a message through the pack link. "Every guard is to look for Grace Winters now! She has left the pack and is to be brought to me once she's found."

"Yes Alpha." Was their response before I heard paws hit the ground and howl off into the forest. I sat down on her mattress putting my head into my hands hoping that she would be found and we could start over again as real mates. I felt heartbroken at the fact that she left but wasn't surprised after everything this pack did. What I did to her.

I abused and raped her... she had her reasons for leaving the pack and me behind. I missed her..the way her long , dark brown curly hair framed her pale white skin. But she would always cower in fear when she saw me. Her mate made her scared. Her beautiful blue eyes held fear when she would look at pack members. I'm was her mate and her Alpha I was supposed to protect her and now I've lost her.

You drove our mate away! He growled upset at what I had done.

I know Xavier why are you talking to me? I thought you were ignoring me

I am but why are you pitying yourself when you're the one who caused her to leave! Pathetic human.

We will find her I promise you that

We better find her and when we do we'll beg for forgiveness and do whatever we can to be the best mate

Of course my wolf hates me for what I did but I can't blame him he had every right to be upset. He was speaking the truth, I had to show Grace that I could be the perfect mate. I wanted her to feel safe and loved when she's with me. Once I find her I'll never let her go. All memories I had of her were not happy memories at all they were all cruel. I tormented her both physically and mentally. I need to change those memories.. I need to make her happy. I will find you Grace even if it's the last thing I do.