Journal || Be More Chill/Dear Evan Hansen

Five: totally fine

Journal Entry: Five 20xx

I'm happy for him.
He seems happy.
I'm not going to destroy his relationship just because I like him more than dudes should.
But I always feel that pang of jealously when they're together.

Why'd I have to feel this way?

Well, good news; me and Christine are friends.
Every since I signed up for Drama or whatever this activity is, the more I realized I actually enjoyed it.
I should get Michael in here.
He should at least get to spend a hour with me, I'm still his best friend.

Right?

It feels like all his time goes to his precious little boyfriend.
He hardly spends time with me anymore.
We don't even hang out at each other's houses that much.
Is this what it felt like when I blocked him out?
Maybe, only his experience was a thousand times worse.

I still feel bad.