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Star had never seen light in Sweven before. The atmosphere was constantly dark, only illuminated by lamp posts, neon signs and borrowed electricity. The viridescent beacon of light that arose from the Whein tower shined on everything across land, as far as she could see. It created brushes of wind through the trees that reminded her of heavy rain. How she missed rain. Ripples in the ocean that reminded her of the sea. And how she loved the sea.
"What was that?" She asked Gabriel, her hands cupping his on the balcony outside her bedroom.
"Val got the diadem," he answered, calm and unimpressed.
She stood back, "But she's in house."
He gave her a smile, the kind where he showed teeth. Playing his her loose curls he confessed, "This is the fourth time I've tried to say this but the timing's never been quite right. I've been keeping it to a minimum, like you said."
"When did I say that?" She noticed the look on his face, one of regret and guilt. "Oh."
"Yeah," he sighed harshly.
She leaned on the railing, "Where are you from?"
"About an hour from now."
"Fuck," she heard herself say.
"You have to tell Val or she's gonna rip this place to shreds."
"So?" She asked, "Isn't that what we want?"
"No," he said as if it were obvious.
"Why not?"
"Because your conscious can still survive."
She froze for a moment, trying to think and piece things together before her mind could communicate with her mouth but too much was flooding in all at once. "No, Tessa would have — "
"You are connected to every single mind in Sweven, Star. You have no idea how selfless you are to be willing to die for the sake of living thousands of people all at once. Tessa didn't want to tell Val without being rational about it, she didn't want an emotional opinion but we know it works and I wanted you to know before you choose death."
Star took a step back, letting go of him. "No," she heard herself say. "This isn't real. No matter how long I've been here, my reality is lying on a gurney doped up on a deceptor. That kind of life isn't real either. I don't want that for myself, Gabe. I'd rather not exist if this life becomes my reality. I want substance."
He was willing to do anything. "But I can loop you — "
"No." But she wasn't about to let him continue to fail at changing her course. "I just ... "
He met her eyes, "What?"
She chewed on the inside of her lip, "Can you take me somewhere?"
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