Little Dreamer

Chapter 1

UNEDITED

"Now we're caught against the tide, those distant days always flashing by"
-James Bay, Hold Back The River.
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Chapter 1: When Saoirse tried to run

Saoirse was running in full speed. She picked up her steps with only one thought in mind.

Please let no one be at home

She chanted it repeatedly in her head like a mantra, pleading that for once her wish would come true. Although, it was quite useless to think so as there are several reasons for it to happen otherwise.

Those reasons being:
1. She is unlucky as hell
2. She is no athlete
3. Her school is farther from the local primary school
4. Her parents have a car

After reasoning with herself, she finally slowed down and took a detour to the playground.

She sat on the swings and lightly swayed against the harsh wind. She could get hypothermia if she was out too long.

But who cares? It's better than getting scolded for another failed assessment, let them see it for all I care.

She was angry at herself, how hard could college be? Why is she failing every assessment? All her classmates at least get B average for their assessment. But no, not her she was failing every single one of her subjects with a big fat ungraded.

She held back the tears that threatened to fall. And swung herself mercilessly on the swing. It creaked under her weight which was a little more than above average.

She hated it, she hated everything about her. There is nothing attractive about her. She's not beautiful, she's not smart, she couldn't draw to save her life, she sings like a dying whale and that's just the noticeable things about her.

She remembered when she was little, she was a carefree bundle of joy. She didn't care what people thought about her. She had dreams as high as the sky. She wished it was summer, thirteen years ago all over again lying down on the grass with Delilah, her nanny.

"Little Star, what do you want to be when you grow up?" Delilah asked.

"I wanna grow up and fly in space with all my friends and make mama and baba happy"

"You want to be an astronaut then?"

"Yes!! I wanna take picture of Jupiter. Its my favourite planet"

"Why is it your favourite planet Little Star?"

"Well, is because Jupiter is really big and pretty and from pictures it shows the swirly swirly red stuff around it and it has a lot of colours and and its really big and really pretty"

Delilah looked at her with adoration, for a four year old, she knows a whole lot about solar systems. Most four year olds can't even read properly and here she is listening to one explaining how much she loves Jupiter. No doubt she's going to grow up beautifully.

"Then I should bring you the planetarium one day"

Delilah didn't get to bring her to the planetarium. She died a month from stage 3 breast cancer. Saoirse still held onto the model space shuttle she bought for her. May her soul rest in peace.

When it was getting dark, Saoirse decided to trek back home in the heavy snow. At this point she was freezing cold and at this point she doesn't mind dying from it.