The Free Spirit

The First Step, 1964 (Part One)

"You set my world on fire..."

I woke up on the first of January, 1964 hardly believing that it was 1964. It certainly didn't feel like 1964, and yet, so it was. The year 1964 was a relatively big year compared to others, as it was the year of the Civil Rights Act, the year that I would enter the music scene for the first time and the year that would have one of the most difficult strains on mine and Don's marriage. We started out on a high note, though, with him coming home the second week of January wearing a new longer hairstyle that I thought looked quite sexy on him. "You look like a movie star, Don Everly," I told him when he finally came home.

"I'm glad ya like it, baby, now how about messin' it up a little?" he asked me, nudging me towards the bedroom. I couldn't say no to him, especially when he looked so irresistibly sexy. We were still feeling the strain on our marriage, though, and that much was evident whenever I brought up my plans for recording in London. "If ya have to do it, why can't ya do it here?"

"Because I have more support in London and besides, American acts aren't making it anymore. I need to be an English act for anyone to notice me," I replied.

"Keep in mind, Elton's startin' school this year, and ya promised me you'd be here when he does, so ya better be," Don warned me as he read the newspaper. I was quiet for a moment as I glared at him.

"What the hell do you mean I better be?" I said to him with a tone of anger.

"Don't you get pissed at me, Catherine. You promised me you'd be here. No more spontaneous trips to London when I go on tour startin' in September. The kids need to go to school," Don told me sternly.

"I'm not a child, Donald, so don't speak to me like I am," I spat back. "Why can't you be here with him? Hmm?"

"My career is already established. Yours ain't even started yet."

"Yours is based in America."

"You're the mother."

"And there it is right there, the real reason I need to be the one to stay with the kids instead of going out doing what you've already been doing for seven years. I have a vagina, so therefore, I don't deserve to do it."

"You know damn well that ain't what I said."

"You said I'm the mother. Well, you're the father. It's 1964, Don, and times are changing. You're perfectly capable of taking care of the kids, too. But you won't because 'I'm the mother' and it's my role as a fucking housewife."

"Watch your mouth, won't ya?"

"I will not watch my mouth. Why don't we see where we are in September, hmm? Then we'll see who gets to stay home with them while Elton goes to school." I stood up and left him sitting there fuming. As angry as I was, I hated arguing with my husband, but despite how much he said he saw women as his equal, he still treated me as if I were beneath him likely because it was simply ingrained in him from early childhood. He was a man, who grew up in a man's world watching women grow up into housewives, not seeing many independent, free-thinking women like myself until I came into his life. He was nearly thirty years old now, and likely would struggle to adapt, but in due time, he would.

Things in Vietnam were escalating. We had already been there for nearly ten years by 1964, but now, the war was becoming nationally unpopular and unwanted. There were 23,000 troops stationed in Vietnam in 1964, many drafted, some that wanted to be there. Young men were being forced to fight when they wanted America to stay out of the conflict, while their young women at home started standing up and rebelling against the government for their young men being taken from them. In truth, I worried about Don getting drafted, despite my anger at him. I loved him more than anything in the world and I wouldn't be able to stand him being forced to fight in a war he didn't need to be in.