Who Do You Love|| 5SOS

Kira: Who?

God I was going to hell. I was going to burn in hell and it would be my fault and nobody else's. 

I couldn't tell Luke. I couldn't tell him I didn't love him anymore. As soon as I looked at him all I could think about was how, just hours earlier, I was begging Calum to fuck me harder, bedsheets balled up in my hands. So no, I couldn't tell Luke and I felt like I couldn't even talk to Calum right now. I had barely looked at him since last night and everyone in the band seemed worried about me now. Everyone.

"Hey!" Michael called out, making me cringe as I continued to nervously pace the empty parking space next to the boys tour bus. "Kira!" He called again. I looked up, biting down hard on my bottom lip. I tried to smile as he approached.

"Hey." Michael came forward slowly, a smile on his face but concern in his eyes. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good. What's up?"

"Well.. You don't seem good. You're pacing outside... Alone. We're all worried about you. Luke says you've been acting funny."

"I'm just a little stressed out about something is all." I admitted which was the truth. "School stuff, the future, but I'm okay. I swear." I pulled my phone out of my back pocket. "I'm just going to call Desiree on your bus. Tell the boys not to worry please." Michael nodded.

"Do you want me to send one of the makeup girls back to keep you company? Or one of the tech people?" I shook my head. I didn't want anyone around. I just needed to talk to Desiree. I needed to talk to someone who wouldn't judge me or make me feel guilty and the only person who could do that was Desiree.

"I'll be fine. I'm just going to talk to Desiree and I'll head back to the stage to watch your performance." Just as I said this, the back door for the arena opened and Calum appeared.

"Michael! We're on soon." I tried not to look at Calum or his impossibly beautiful features. Michael glanced at Calum and gestured he'd be in in a minute before turning back to me. Calum slowly headed back inside.

"Well okay but come here." Michael was opening his arms up.

"Why?"

"You look like you need a hug." He said softly. Feeling like I was close to tears, I walked towards him and let him wrap me up in one of his big bear hugs, squeezing me tightly into his chest as my arms went around his back.

"Thanks Michael. I needed that." I felt him kiss my hair.

"Anything for you lil girl. I'll see you soon okay." I smiled, nodding, hoping he couldn't tell that I wanted to cry. Michael smiled and turned around to head inside while I nearly bolted into the empty tour bus, locking the door behind me.

My hands shook as I went to my contacts and called Desiree's phone. I didn't know what time it was in Australia currently but I didn't very much care and I don't think Desiree would care either.

"What up, what up, what up!" Desiree shouted into my ear as soon as I answered. "I've missed you Smol One. Who has been keeping you from me. Why is this the first time you've called in like... Forever?" She's right. The last time we talked on the phone was when... I was asking her advice about Calum.

"Hey Des. I need to tell you something." I must have sounded really upset because Desiree went quiet which is unusual for her. Tears began to form in my eyes.

"Who?" Desiree asked.

"W-what?" I asked, beginning to hyperventilate a little.

"Who did you kiss and when are you going to wire me the money you owe me?"