INTO MY WORLD (ENG.VER) - [FF EXO]

Chapter 6

Sun Hyang

    My alarm rings at 7PM, and night has already fallen. I was able to get eight hours of sleep, and even if I don't feel fully refreshed, it should be enough for now. I sit up and, right away, I can tell that something is wrong: where is Baekhyun?

I jump out of bed, panicked, before noticing the light underneath the toilet door. I sigh out in relief. He's visibly taken new habits too, since the gun I'd given him and put back on the bedside table isn't there anymore: I'm glad he finally understands he's in danger anywhere. Even if taking him to the loos is perhaps a little excessive, especially if I'm here. But then again...

I go to the bathroom, brush my teeth and comb my hair. I look terrible but hey, why should I care? I walk back into the room again, check my backpack and my ammunition. It's a habit. I slip the window ajar to let some fresh air in. The wind caresses my face and I close my eyes, taking in its soothing touch. I have to wait for Baekhyun to leave the toilets, and then we're going. But where to? The memories from last night suddenly flood my mind – what have I done? Why did I give him my name?

I'd felt appeased when he'd apologised, sort of grateful actually. Like it had rubbed out a portion of that fearsome shock I'd felt back in the car, when he had talked about our relationship. I'd been so scared, and so mad at him for making me feel like this. Those kinds of feelings are forbidden, I am not allowed to consider anything else but professionalism where he's concerned, and I manage that very well, so long as he's not around.

But he apologised, and that erases everything, right?

Of course what he'd told me yesterday at the same time as he'd said sorry hadn't really traced back to that idea, and neither had the fact that I'd given him my name, but... I'd like to say sleep deprivation got the best of me, that it was against my wishes, or even that it had all been his fault – him and his soothing voice, and soothing words – but I'm well aware that's not true. I gave him my real name because I wanted to. And even now, my mind still curses me for having told him, my brain scolding me thoroughly, and I can almost hear my instructor's voice shouting at me from the times where I was still in training that, at this rate, I'm gonna get myself killed before I can say "shit".

But a tiny part of me, a part deeply buried inside that has taken an alarming liking to showing itself lately, is happy that I confessed, and rejoices in getting closer to him little by little, regardless of the consequences. But this tiny part is much too small for the soldier in me to let it come out. No – it'll stay right where it is, nice and hidden, concealed from his eyes, but also from mine.

Proud of this new resolution, I allow myself a small satisfied smile, and look out the window as I wait for Baekhyun. A fifty-year-old couple drives in the parking lot, and parks in a space there. The woman comes out, visibly furious: she's throwing her arms around, fretting, and I can't help but laugh. In a shrill voice, she shouts at her husband, who looks completely lost, poor soul. I can hear everything through my open window, which just goes to show how loud she's actually being:

"What an idiot! All you had to do was follow the GPS's directions!"

"But..."

"Don't you speak! They were simple directions!"

I laugh and close the window: poor old chap!

Baekhyun is still not out yet: what the hell is he up to, is he making the goddamned toilets? I make my bed as I wait – another habit I inherited from the army, as cliché as it might sound. I stop mid-act: arms still outstretched, the clouds obstructing my vision clear away: the GPS! Fuck I'm so dumb, how could I have forgotten? The GPS! I can't believe it, the GPS!