Merlin Oneshots

3. Merlin's secrets (part 2)

(A/N: This twoshot can also be found in my general oneshots book)

Merlin's POV:

I woke up the next morning feeling like I'd been trampled over by an army and their horses. My eyes hurt from where I hadn't dried my tears and I had a major headache from the nightmares. I supposed I was probably crying or something of the sort the previous night. I don't understand. I'd been doing a great job of hiding it recently, the sadness, I mean. It only took a Strawberry and the mention of that damned gorgeous lake to send me into a downwards spiral.

It's not like I was always sad. I was happy quite a lot, actually. It's just... every so often I got a reminder and I spiral again. I knew I should talk about it but I physically couldn't. If I were to speak of it, I'd have to reveal my biggest secret. The secret that could get me killed. My magic. I did talk about it sometimes, I went down to Avalon and spoke to Freya. She didn't answer but I liked to think she was listening.

Reckoning I'd get flooded with questions that morning, I decided to act as if nothing happened the previous night. That way, they wouldn't get suspicious because I could use the excuse that I was just tired. I knew it was a long shot but I went for it.

"Merlin?" I heard Arthur call as I sat up. I noticed all the knights sitting by the fire.

"Yes, Sire?" I asked in my regular tone and he gave me an odd look, "I suppose you want me to cook breakfast?" I cocked a small smirk for extra effect.

"No, no. Elyan's cooking." He eyed me warily and with concern.

"Oh. I see." I was so confused, I was the servant. Why wasn't I cooking? Was he going to sack me?

"Thought you needed a break." Elyan smiled from behind Arthur.

"Right..." I trailed off, getting up to sit by the fire. I noticed that there wasn't much fire wood so I got back up again.

"Where do you think you're goin'?" Gwaine asked.

"To get fire wood?" I said but it came out as more of a question.

"No you're not. I've got it." Leon smirked as he walked into the forest.

"Okay... I guess I'll just pack up while you guys are doing that then." I said, feeling the need to busy myself.

"We'll do it." Percival nodded, grabbing Gwaine.

"I'll go feed the horses then." I needed to do something.

"I'll do it." Lancelot smiled and left to feel the horses.

"Alright, What's going on?" I huffed with a light smile, "Is it prank Merlin day or something?"

"No. Nothing like that. We just wanted you to know that we're here to help when you need it." Arthur smiled warmly and that's what confused me the most.

"Umm..." I wasn't quite sure what to make of it until I recalled the events of the previous night once more, "Look, I told you. Last night I was just tired. I'm perfectly fine." I don't think I was very convincing but they didn't pry, thinking I'd tell them later.

Arthur's POV:

After Merlin deflected our offer of help, I sighed and only hoped he'd tell us later. Although he was acting as if nothing happened, I knew he was doing just that: acting. His shoulders were still tense and he refused to look anyone directly in the eye. I also knew that he was crying the night before.

***

We rode through the woods once more, no one spoke a word. It was quiet. Too quiet. Not a bird's tweet. Nothing. I'd learnt not to trust that in woods such as these, Merlin taught me that. I was about to voice these opinions when a group of armed bandits jumped from the banks and trees. Their weapons raised as they charged. We immediately fell into battle. We were outnumbered but we're knights of Camelot.  They couldn't defeat us.