starving || brendon urie

eighteen

real life

josephine hatter smoothed out her silver cocktail dress for the fifteenth time, then examined herself in the mirror. to say she was nervous is an understatement. she had just gotten off the red carpet and changed into her first look of the night. the show didn't begin for another half hour or so, yet she was still anxious as hell.

"josie, you okay?" izzy asked, stepping into her dressing room.

"yeah..just nervous," the girl replied and turned to her friend.

"you're going to kill this, okay? don't even worry about it."

"it's still a lot."

"i know. i'll be right in the front row, alright?"

josephine nodded, but it didn't assure her too much. she sighed and checked her phone.

"have you seen you-know-who yet?" izzy questioned, sitting next to her friend.

"brendon?"

she nodded.

"no—well i mean, i saw him on the carpet but he didn't notice me. he looks really good."

izzy was the only person josephine told about her little thing for brendon. she knew she could trust her with her life.

"you have to go say hi, jo! what are you waiting for?!"

"i don't know...we haven't texted in weeks."

"so?! go make it right with him!"

"izzy—"

"josephine ann hatter, get out there and go see brendon!"

josephine sighed and stood up. izzy watched her leave the small room with a proud expression.

"if this goes wrong, it's all your fault," josephine taunted.

"i promise you it won't."

she sighed and ventured down the long hallway of dressing rooms. she read each of the signs until she found the one she was looking for; panic! at the disco.

she stopped in front of the door and took a deep breath. raising a shaky hand, she knocked on the big wooden door. seconds later, it opened.

and there he was: brendon boyd urie, lead singer of panic! at the disco. josephine's breath hitched as she looked him up and down. his velvet jacket was strewn on the couch. his black button-down was undone, exposing his chiseled torso. his belt was still holding up his dress pants and the sparkly louboutin boots were still on his feet.

"josephine?"

she snapped out of her little daze and looked him in his beautiful, brown eyes.

"uh—hi."

"hello!! how are you?" he asked excitedly and pulled her in for a hug. josephine was taken back for a second, but eventually wrapped her arms around him. the height difference between the two was laughable. josephine has always been short, but standing next to a man that was considered short made her feel smaller.

"it's so nice to finally meet you! how have you been?" he said with a welcoming smile.

"i'm um-i'm good, i guess. you?"

"i'm great! come on in! how long do you have?"

"i'm not really sure..."

"that's alright. we can talk for a little bit. how's hosting goin'?"

the two carried a conversation, and for once in her life, josephine was flustered by a man. she had never had feelings like this before. it was all so new, and she had no clue how to handle it.

brendon somewhat understood this—he knew that there was something between them—so he tried his best to make her comfortable. he asked her about the movies she was filming and the late night television appearances she had made in the past few months. slowly but surely, they were talking like old friends.

"but you've never tried acting?" josephine asked.

"i mean i've auditioned for stuff before, but the anxiety—it's something else. i don't know how you do it."

she shrugged, "it takes a second to get used to, but it's so rewarding."

"and you're stellar at it."

"well, thank you. but i'm sure writing music is just as tough."

"don't you write?"

"yeah, but i usually get help from my friends. it's really hard for me to express that kind of stuff into lyrics, and i never compose."

"composing is the hardest part. i mean, i usually just mess around with all the editing software until something sounds good enough. and i like to drum."

josephine laughed, "you don't strike me as a drummer."

"oh trust me. when i get a pair of drumsticks, the shirt comes off and i just go ham on the skins."

that comment caused josephine to laugh more. brendon smiled. he had grown to appreciate her laugh after facetiming for the first time. hearing it in person made him love it even more.

soon enough, there was a knock on the dressing room door.

"josephine? it's showtime," a lady with a headset said.

she sighed and turned to her new friend, "duty calls. i'll see you after?"

"i'll be sure of it. good luck, jojo!"

"oh, shush."

they hugged one last time before the lady led josephine out of the room. she couldn't help but immediately miss his energetic presence.