The Definition Of A Hero

III | who are the bearers of bad news?

bearers of bad news: a person or thing that is regarded as unpleasant, unlucky, or undesirable.

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  III| who are the bearers of bad news?

Lauren and her stupid junkie boyfriend, Marcus. Lauren, I don't care too much about her picking me up but when she's with Marcus then everything's different. It's like she's Lauren 2.0. and believe me it's not an upgrade. Marcus makes her act like another person: quiet and laid back. But most importantly because she was drugged up. That wasn't Lauren. At least not the one I knew; she was like a knock off version of a grunge or some emo kid that thought they were kinda cool. Or high.

The ride to our house was always quiet and kind've awkward considering the fact that Lauren and Marcus didn't speak. then again they never really spoke much about anything when I was in the car with them. Maybe it was some rule about not saying anything in front of your little sister or something. But I wouldn't snitch. Either way it didn't make me think anything more or less about them.

I didn't get to know anything about Marcus other than just his tattered appearance and hearing him speak to Lauren to say he was outside sometimes but other than that nothing has really come out of his mouth that could prove the mere fact that he's not good enough for my sister. Lauren was usually stand-offish at home and that was perfectly fine with me since she would still sit with us at dinner and she would make the occasional joke before going to bed. But, like I said, this was Marcus's Lauren not mine. Now she was just a colossal bit-

"Get out of the car, Alec. It's time to go home and Mom's waiting on you. I don't feel like hearing her ringtone on my phone since she's gonna ask questions soon." I looked out of the window snapping my mind out of its thoughts; coming back to reality again.

"What about you? Are you staying home this time?"

"I'm not coming home right now. I'm-"

"No, let me guess. You're staying over at Marcus's again, right?"

"Alec, I didn't ask for you to explain my plans for today. I know what they are, ok? Now come on."

When Lauren pulled up to the front of the house she just opened the door, let me out, and, without saying anything, she and Marcus were pulling off faster than a racer in NASCAR. It was strange. She usually always gets out of her car and tells Mom where she's going and gives me a hug. Marcus must be rubbing off on her more than I thought. I mean I don't know if Marcus actually does drugs or not but I do know that he always seems out of it when I see him and that's enough.

Sometimes I wish I could just tell him that Lauren's my sister. Not his. I haven't gotten a chance to talk to her after she got to 8th grade and wasn't the same. It's like after that she became the absolute worst person to try to communicate with or understand. She must get that from Dad. I should add that to my book when I make it upstairs.

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I pull the book out of my shoebox under my bed and sneak into Lauren's room. It had all her sketches and stuff on walls that she used to draw over. She said that she's gonna be an artist one day and her pictures are going to hang with the Mona Lisa. I believe that she still can have that dream but she's never finished painting the sketches. She also left a ton of old sketchbooks in her bottom desk drawer and luckily I found one a while back when she first bought one that I could use. Except I sketched different pictures than Lauren's. Mines were pages on thoughts that I had about who Dad is. Lauren met him in 8th grade but I'm in 9th and I still haven't seen him.

The page I left off on was page thirty-four and it read: Must Be Artistic. Mom for sure can't draw so Lauren and I must pick it up from our Dad. The newest update to my book is: Must Be Difficult and Hard To Get Along With.

Underneath I started to sketch out me speaking to a brick wall. Speaking to Lauren. I just don't understand her different personalities. How she's a different person around certain groups of people. And now that I actually get to see her at school I realize that she's kind've well known because nobody knows the real her. It makes me see that I don't think I ever did know Lauren and maybe I don't want to.

When I go to close the book I can see the sketch that I got one of the art geeks at school to draw for me a while back. It was a portrait that consisted of me just naming different attributes of Lauren and I that share that our mom doesn't, therefore making a somewhat picture of what Dad could look like. I laid back on my bed and stared. How long would it be before I could see my dad again? If I ever got the chance to, that is.