Three — The Kiss
"Do you wanna kiss me?"
I grinned at that memory. Her slurred words, her glassy eyes, her bold stunt. I can't believe it! I am well aware that the alcohol made her do that, what do they say about drunk people? They mean what they say and especially what they do.
I was as drunk, I admit, but that doesn't mean I wasn't taken aback. I was surprised and excited and stoke! God knows how much I do wanna kiss her. That is why I nodded, di ba?
I'm more drunk in love more than I'm drunk from drinking alcohol.
Grabe kasi si Kuya, he gifted us hard drinks!
I don't regret it though. I told her we'll both remember this. We both will, definitely. And we'll share more kisses to remember for the rest of our lives. Until our future kids will puke hearts and butterflies because of how cheesy we both are.
I love her, so she can kiss me whenever and however she wants. I gave her all the right to own me the way she pleases.
She loves me, so I can kiss her whenever and however I want. I have all the right to own her the way I please.
We weren't hurting anybody, wasn't even our intention. I understand that we both put our co-housemates into a very uncomfortable situation and that is where I feel sorry. I feel sorry that I kind of, if not entirely, disrespected a culture, that I became oblivious of the people who were with us. But I will never be sorry that I kissed her.
There were a lot of times I wanted to do just that, but I had to consider a lot of things, a lot of people, a lot of reaction. I am not going to pull out the 'I was drunk' card, drunk or not I'd kiss her. But not in that kind of situation. Not in a place where the whole nation is watching us. Not where people thinks that they are entitled to judge us.
But it happened.
And I never knew how much hate I got, mainly Lou because of what happened until we went out of the house.
At first, I was gutted. Like, people saying that I don't really love her, that it's all lust. What the fuck? But eventually, I managed to deal with all the hate. I made a mistake and these issues and conclusions about me are the consequences.
Tell you what, I can live my life proving how much I love Lou. That's just something that I always wanted to do, show her what she deserves, give her all the love I can give and even go beyond it.
It's like, I was born to shower her with love and affection. To make her my queen.
You know what pained me most? It was when I found out how impactful that time is to Lou's reputation as a woman. I felt so awful that one moment, I started to doubt myself, too.
But I didn't want to live without her. I just couldn't. And even if at some point I knew I didn't deserve her, I pursued her. I had to earn it the hard way though, her family gave me a tough time.
It's worth it.
She's worth it.
Now I can only laugh at the memory as I watch the woman I drunk-kiss on reality tv show who is now my girlfriend.
Yes, dudes, she's off-limits.
She's dancing like a weirdo at the sink in my condo while washing the plates. We just had a date.
Yes, a date. Inside my condo. Where no one can see us, no one can judge us. Where we won't have to calculate our every movement.
Ako nagluto so she volunteered to wash the plates. I wanted to help her but Lou being Lou, she's Lou. If that even makes sense.
