boys like boys ✔ luwoo

|27|

|| Wong Lucas ||

I knew from the start Kim Jungwoo wasn't someone you could make happy with a bit of attention and love. His wounds were deeper than I could ever reach. His problem was eating him from his core. He was more than grateful that his skin covered his black heart, black lungs, black mind, and black soul. It took me a while but I know it wasn't Siwoo who pushed him away and it surely wasn't Taeyong.

It was me.

Jungwoo didn't know love. He didn't know how to give it or receive it. He didn't even know what it looked like. So a guy like me, making him feel love for the first time. I could only imagine how scary it is. I could only imagine how hard it must of been for his black heart. How tough it would be to breathe with his black lungs. How tough it was to think with his black mind. And how frustrating it must have felt to have his black soul fill itself with joy.

I could only imagine the fear he had to live with everyday knowing the man who hurt him and left him returned to repeat the cycle. It only infuriated me that I had no fucking clue that his pain went beyond the homophobic beings around him. It came from the root of a persons happiness. It came from his own family. He hid himself from the world because he was scared what his family would do.

Three months later and I still get the stares. I still get the questions. "Did Jungwoo just off himself" or "was the break up really that bad?"

I shrug or I smile. But I never answer. Because I don't know. Is Jungwoo still alive? Was our break up a tragedy? I don't know.

"Yaebin! The baby bump looks beautiful on you!" I called as she sat proudly on Yuta's lap. "Y'all planning on continuing this expansion?" I winked at the male who gave me a death glare. "I'm joking." I raised my hands in surrender.

Kun fixed his silverware that my elbow accidentally knocked into. I apologized and waited for Dongyoung to sit down before saying anything else. He does have all the answers to the homework and I don't want to annoy him.

"Rice cake?" He offered. I shrugged and accepted the treat. Then loudly but obviously directed toward me, I hear Taeyong awe. We all looked over to his table that contained the same toxic people. "Fuck them," Dongyoung snickered.

"Yeah," Kun smiled. "Fuck them."