Struggling to be me

8

When we eventually got home we went up to my room and sat on my bed playing on our phones, we got so tried that we fell asleep right there in our clothes.

The next morning I woke up and I felt a body pressing against me and there was an arm around me... at first I couldn't remember who it was, then I realised it was sean. I looked round at him and I saw his beautiful face sleeping.

I turned back round and looked at the time, it was 6:45.

I slowly pulled his arm off me and put it on the bed so I didn't wake him up and went and I went for a morning swim.

Just as I got out of the pool I saw sean running towards me.

SPLASH! He pushed me into the pool, he still had his clothes on from yesterday, but I still pulled him into the pool with me. He kissed my quickly and then we got out to go and get breakfast.

Lucy had made waffles and pancakes so as we munched away sean asked me "so are we going out then?"

"Sean... do you really think that's a good idea with all the stuff going on with Ryan and your parents!" I replied

"I guess" he said, I could see the disappointment on his face and for the rest of the meal we sat in silence.

"Come on then, lets go and get dressed" I said  breaking the silence. So we went upstairs and he went into the room that he was meant to sleep in last night to get changed.

We got driven to school and everyone wonders why sean was getting out of my limo, and soon enough rumours started to spread.

After tutor, I had no lessons with sean so
We both got on with our days, I spent most of mine with Mia.

We met at the end of the day and we got in the limo to go back to my mansion .

When we got back I said "wanna go and play basketball on the courts"
He replied with "omg you have basketball courts here"
"Yup I said, and tennis courts too!"

So we went and played basketball for an hour and afterwards I thought  about what I said at breakfast. I needed to talk to Sean about it.

So when we got inside, I told sean I wanted to talk to him so we went up to my room and I said "I'm sorry about what I said this morning, but don't you think with Ryan and your friends... well if they found out they probably would hurt you and I don't want you to go through that, after what is happening with you and your parents and all... I'm sorry"

"It's ok" he replied "shall we go for a swim?"
"Sure" I said

So we got into our speedos and dived into the pool. We messed around for hours, diving and flipping and all sorts, we both had fun.

After a while, Lucy called me inside, I told sean to stay there and that I would be back in a few minutes.

I ran inside and Lucy had a solemn face on her... "is everything ok" I asked
"Well, not exactly" she replied "your step dad is very ill and I wondered if you would like to fly to England and see him?"

"Is it life threatening" I said
She replied with a no and this was my response "no I won't go and see him then, he always hated me and I hated him, imagine what he would have said if I had told him I was gay-"
I accidentally told her that I was gay
OMG!!!

"Oops, erm... yeah I guess I'm gay..."

"Don't worry" she said "I won't judge you... and I already knew"

"What, how"

"The last night Sean's bed sheets were un slept in, but yours however were very well slept In..."
There was a silence
"...and I saw you two kissing I the pool this morning" she chuckled

At first I was silent, then I just laughed.
I felt like a weight had been pulled off my shoulders.
"Thanks, but now I really need to get back to sean" I giggled
"Ok have fun" Lucy said "but not too much fun" she laughed

"Haha, ok" I yelled as I ran back outside, dropped the towel I was holding around myself and did a backflip into the pool!

A bit later me and Sean dried off, and we went inside for dinner.

Whilst we were eating, Sean said he wanted to show me something... and as soon as we had finished dinner i needed to get ready to go out.

Wondering what it was, I finished my dinner and rushed upstairs to get changed. I quickly slipped on a Gucci shirt and some Armani jeans, and met Sean (who had also changed into the clothes we got yesterday) downstairs.

Sean said he wanted to show me what it was like for a normal person in LA, someone who wasn't rich.

So instead of the limo, Sean hired a taxi and we drove down to downtown LA, stopped at Dunkin donuts and went all the way back up to the Hollywood sign. By this time it was about 10:30, it was good we didn't have school the next day as it was Friday.

We paid te taxi driver and ten we walked along the Hollywood walk of fame, all the way to the sign!

When we got there we sat down in front of it and watched the sun set. It was beautiful. Seeing all the lights of La. all the traffic in the city. Yet it was so quiet.  I could hear Sean breathing. Every breath.

We sat in silence for a while then he looked at me straight in the eye and said "you know, I have known you for two days and it feels like I've known you forever"

I looked at him back, a smile forming in the corner of my mouth. "Sean" I said "will you go out with me..."

...

...

...

The silence killed me
His deep blue eyes looked onto mine
I could only wait
And then at last
He said "of course"

Then he ran over to me and kissed me.

He pushed me onto the floor, not breaking the kiss, his powerful muscles pushing on mine. I loved every second of it. I never wanted it to stop. But it did. In probably the worst way possible.

Someone called Sean's name in surprise and horror. He turned around, got off me and stared Shock. I didn't know who they were until Sean called out "mum... dad..."

My heart stopped, my mouth fell open, I didn't know what was going to happen!