i wanna end me. [ paused ]

three

I remember the fifth grade when I saw a horror film with my then best friend Zoé. She had a sleepover at my house with me that night. Zoé was beautiful. Long, wavy hair. Green, mysterious eyes. Always a gentle smile on her full lips.

The brown-haired girl loved to watch horror movies. Not to mention me. Horror movies have never been my thing. But hers, which meant for me, that I had to watch every time. I would have done everything for her, but unfortunately she moved away from here and we lost sight of each other. And so she lived her life and so did I.

My life was completely turned upside down. Especially now. The incident in the alley is now about a week ago. I tried to forget him, but the deep brown eyes of the curly haired-boy didn't go out of my head. As his long fingers reached for my wrist and his firm grip left a slight purple spot on my wrist.

"Riley, you are very quiet today."

All eyes were on me. I sat in the middle of biology lessons and looked up, after I dove into my sketched notebook. The unknown dark-haired boy was a new sketch-inspiration for me. Thoughtfully, I rubbed my wrist.

"Can you tell me what the typical symptoms of toxic shock syndrome are?" Miss Lorenz tilted her head slightly and looked at me sternly.

"uh .. yes of course ..", I took a deep breath, "typical symptoms and signs of toxic shock syndrome are those like ... high fever, palpitations ... blood pressure drop or low blood pressure ... um ... unconsciousness, nausea and vomiting .. Diarrhea, rash, dizziness and finally .. body aches. " 

I raised an eyebrow and formed my lips into a narrow line. Miss Lorenz nodded: "Very good .. report more often, your contributions to the class will bring us a lot further." Again the woman looked into her book and sighed.

Time to sink into my thoughts again. (ha Gotcha)

No emails, no new messages in the news, no sign, nothing. Only the thought of the dark-eyed boy was left to me. Maybe I should have called the police, because it seems to me that something is missing .. only I don't know what.

-

The smell of cheap school food was in the air as soon as I entered the cafeteria. It was finally lunch break. Bored, I ran to the table where Drew was already waiting for me. She still had lessons, not me, but I stayed with her for lunch.

"Ginger!", She put down her glass of water and smiled, "You look like you slept." Playfully, I rolled my eyes, with a gentle smile on my lips. Drew's shoulder-length hair was a bit wavy today, her outfit, as always, was perfectly selected and she looked as breathtaking as always.

"Yes, I slept ... I'm pretty good today", I went through my rose-colored hair and left me on the uncomfortable cafeteria chair. The dark-eyed girl looked back at her glass of water and then saw my hand.

"W-what happened to that?" I rubbed my wrist again: "I ... uhm i don't know I tripped ad..." "Oh, did you at least cool it?" She raised an eyebrow as she sipped her glass of water. No I did not. "Yeah, sure," I said again and stroked a few red highlights of my hair behind my ear. 

Drew looked away towards the window."Hey look, ha," she pointed unobtrusively out of the window and stood up slowly. "Looks like Chuck and his chick are arguing." My gaze now wandered out the window.

Chuck and Destiny. The dream couple. Chuck, the football team's favorite captain, while Destiny was a pretty cheerleader. Typical huh? 

With a sigh, I reached for my backpack and followed Drew, who made her way outside to listen. "Drew," I hissed behind her. She turned and held her index finger at her mouth.

"Shush it for once, Riley."

I paused immediately and looked around. We were about the main entrance to the school, a bit close to the road. I sighed again and listened to Destiny and Chuck.

"After the party, you were at home, huh?" Destiny's shoulder-length brown hair was tied to a half-braid, "Right with Riley?" Wait Me? "What? No!" Chuck hissed back. "Mads told me something else, she saw you two!", She stamped angrily on the floor and turned around.

At that moment, she saw me. Fuck. She looked at me with rage. "Yeet no", Drew said. "Riley, you are so dead", the pretty brunette turned into a nightmare. She kept getting closer and closer until I felt a hard and cold fist in my face.

I staggered back, holding my hand in front of my nose. The more or less warm blood dripped from my chin to my white shirt. My breath was controlled and my eyes focused on Destiny. The brown-eyed girl stared at me: "That happens when you sleep with my friend."

I was dizzy. The metallic smell of the blood rose in my nose and I felt how Drew reached for my arm. "Go to hell, Riley", Destiny turned around. 

That's enough. I shook off Drew's arm and walked behind the fury.

"No, Riley do not do that!" I heard Drew say. 

Quickly I reached for the hair of the beautiful cheerleader and pulled her to me. A short time later, my hand clenched into a fist, which landed with full force in the belly of Destiny. A soft scream escaped her lips and she dropped to her knees.

I lifted my knee and tried hard to kick her into her face. However, I was pulled away from behind and saw Destiny pulled away from Chuck.

"Let me go Drew!" I almost screamed and tried to shake off. The anger was boiling inside of me and all I wanted was to see Destiny lying on the floor, suffering.  It wasn't the first time she came up to me and challenged me. This time, I wanted to show her that I'm not weak.

When I looked at Destiny, I saw that her face was covered in blood. My eyes darted to my aching fist. A soft aching groan escaped my mouth and I took a deep breath.The handsome brunette boy looked at me first, then at Destiny, who he picked up in the next moment and ran away.

Then Drew let me go.

"What ... was that," my scared friend mumbled. I noticed how the blood literally poured out of my nose. "Oh man, you really got it," she took a step closer. "N-no Drew, leave me ... just for a second", my breath was a bit more controlled. Drew looked worried.

I turned around and just tried to get away from this place.Where my blood dripped onto the cold stone floor. There, where the brunette had missed me one. Way, just gone. Forget it.

"Riley where-" "See you tomorrow, Drew," and I left the campus. The nosebleed had still not stopped and my shirt was dotted in a dark red. I frowned and bit back our tears.

My eyes burned and my tongue was as dry as the desert. After a while, I still had not arrived home. Usually I also took the bus. With my head on the bode I crossed the street and suddenly I heard a loud honking. 

I looked up startled and saw a black BMW that had stopped just before the car hit me. "Look at the-" I heard suddenly the person stopped talking. The car door opened and he got out. "Riley?"

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hey.

yeehaw  another chapter and dude I HATE THIS CHAPTER. BUT, i still hope y'all like it. Thank you for being here <33