// BILLIE EILISH IMAGINES //

Painful Goodbye

  You and Billie were happy back then. Hanging out just like a normal couple, she was more loving, caring but now, everything has changed.

  A lot has change ever since. She comes home late, smelling like alcohol  with a mixture of a woman's scent. You knew from the start that she was cheating behind your back. But you shrugged it off since you love her. Love does makes you blind.

  And the most painful part is, you have a heart cancer stage 4. You can't tell her because you know that's gonna hurt her. That's why you can't bring yourself to be mad and pointing out she's cheating on you. You kept it yourself and you know for the fact that the doctor said that you have 3 months left to live.

  Till one night, while you're sleeping alone on your bedroom, you woke up feeling your throat dry. You got up from your bed and went to the kitchen to grab some water. You heard the door clicked open, meaning Billie's home. But you heard another  voice, a woman's voice which made your heart ache.

  You leaned near the door frame that leads to the living room, as you heard them conversing.

"When are you planning to leave her?" the girl with a high pitched voice said.

"Maybe this month, sugar." Billie replied. She now calls her sugar, her nickname for you. Only you.

"Why did you even stayed with her anyways?" the girl said, making you mad and hurt at the same time.

"Well, she helped me with my dreams, but believe me, she's a burden nowadays. She is so clingy. It's starting to annoy me." Billie replied. A single tear left your eye, clutching your chest, while silently watching them both.

  They crashed their lips to each other, making you clutch your eyes shut. You can't watch anymore. You just can't keep up with this. You've had enough. You silently walk back to your shared bedroom and cry silently till you fell asleep.

-----

  You woke up, seeing Billie on your side sleeping soundly. Yesterday just flashed back before your eyes and it makes you sick. You got up from the bed to pack your things. You silently grab all of your things and got ready.

  After minutes of packing, you wrote her a letter and kissed her forehead. You look at her one more time and your tears starting to well up again.

  You grabbed the doorknob from the door and opened it. You look back, smiling bitterly and you closed the door behind you. Leaving all the happy memories behind.

  Billie woke up from her slumber and she glanced at the time. 8:30 it read. She got up from the bed and do her usual morning routine. She noticed that the house was quiet. She moved to the kitchen and by her surprise, you haven't cooked her breakfast.

Huh. How unusual. She thought.

  She roamed the house and she never saw you. She started to get worried and dialed your number. But there was no response. Straight to voicemail. Then there she noticed, the letter you left for her.

  She opened it and read it.

Dear Billie,

          I'm sorry I went to writing this letter and not telling you this in person because I chickened out. I just want to say that I am sorry. For being a burden, annoying and clingy. And if you're wondering about how I found out that you said those words, yes. I eavesdrop and watch you both make out in the living room. I just want to make the most of my life being happy with you because my time is almost up. And yes, I am diagnosed with heart cancer. I'm sorry if I didn't tell you. But I guess you wouldn't care less even if told you. Do me a favor. Be happy, love her. That's all I wanted. Goodbye Billie, forever. I love you.

                                                       - Y/n

  As soon she read the last part of the letter, tears came running down her face. Guilt is starting to hit her. She knows that she cannot do anything to bring you back. You did loved her. But she never does away. It's true that when a person who truly cares for you leaves, you'll start to miss them.

 Months have passed and she spend most of her time searching for you, she even asked your parents but they said that you needed to be away from her. She soon broke up with the girl, because she was only after her money. While you stayed at the hospital for treatment, hoping a miracle will happen. But unfortunately, you got weaker and paler everday. The doctors said that there's nothing left to do. You accepted the fact and counted the days left you have now.

  Finally, your parents let Billie see you for the last time. Billie opened up the door, and you met eyes with her. She showed up with white tulips. She sat down beside you and carefully caressed your hair. She started to break down and hugged your fragile body, bawling her eyes out.

"I'm s-sorry, y/n. For e-everything." she said, sobbing. You weakly hugged her, rubbing her back to sooth her.

"You know I'll still forgive you, right? Despite the fact that you have cheated behind my back these past 2 and a half months that I've been living. I'm sorry if  I wasn't enough for you. But I know that you deserve better." You weakly replied.

"Please live. Leave a little longer, for me? Please." she begged, pulling back from the hug to look at you.

"I-I can't, Billie. It's too late. There's nothing for me to do anything about it. The doctors told me too." You said, smiling bitterly.

  She continued to cry and promised to stay on your side until the last day. She brought you foods, she sings for you, telling you all about her days and her making silly faces. You still love her despite of what she did.

  The last day has come, and she held your hand. Her eyes were red and puffy, meaning she's been crying a lot.

"Billie, thank you for everything. I-I can't thank y-you e-enough. Thank you f-for making my last month memorable." You muttered weakly, smiling at her. She nods and sniffs, while your family and friends is standing next to you.

  You smiled and closed your eyes, your memories started to flash before your eyes. That's it. You're gone from this world. She gave you one last kiss on the forehead and the nurses pulled the white sheet over your body. Yes it was painful to see you go, but it's for the best.

  After burying you, she always bring you flowers, white tulips. Your favourite. She prayed that you are now in a happy place. She stands in front of your tomb and muttered,

"I love you."

  A cold wind blew past her and she heard a familiar voice saying,

"I love you too."

  She smiled and looked up in the sky, before leaving the cemetery.