No Strings *COMPLETE*

Chapter 13

"Where's Noey?" I ask my mother. She gives me a look like she had never heard that name a day in her life, "Mom... Where. Is. Noey?"  I inquire once more, slower this time. Tears form in her eyes. "Honey now is not the time. Okay?" She says, taking both of her hands and patting my hair. Why is she crying? And why isn't my little sister here with the rest of my  family on the biggest holiday of the year?" It makes no sense. My mom would have made her spend time with the family.

No one else is paying attention to the conversation we're having, so I grab her hand and pull kitchen is unoccupied, so far. 

I spin to face her, worried now and she bursts into tears. 

"Mom, where's Noey?!" I demand. She sniffles, "She's not here Skilar," she says quietly. "what do you mean she's not here?" I shout. "Ski, Noey killed herself..." Alec says from behind.

"What...?" I say, looking at Alec. 

"I'm sorry..." He says, tears streaming down his face. I stare at him, frozen in place. I can't move. I can't scream. Tears pour from my eyes. My little... My 13-year-old sister... How could she feel so much pain in her heart that she could do that to herself... To me, and for my family to know and not say a word to me? That's just the icing on the cake.

"How long have you known?" I ask Alec, poison dripping in my tone. "I- A couple of weeks..." He says, trailing off. "You've known for that long and nobody's said anything to me?!" I yell, infuriated with both of them. 

"Honey I didn't want to worry you at college. I'm so sorry."  My mom says, reaching for me. "Don't touch me right now," I tell her, backing away. "I need to go..." I storm out of the kitchen and out of the house. 

Obviously noticing my demeanor, Nathan follows me out the front door and grabs my hand. Out of reaction, I smack him really hard. I turn around quickly and cover my mouth. I can't believe I just did that... He's got a shocked look on his face. I wait for him to yell at me or ask why the fuck I slapped him... But he doesn't. He yanks me to him wrapping his arms around me. I don't fight him. I give in and sob into his chest. I scream and cry and for once... I don't care. I just want this pain to stop. 

After a few minutes, I pull away from him and wipe my tears. He gives me a genuinely concerned look like he's worried about me and nothing has happened between up this past week. "Nathan I-I... Have to go," I mumble, continuing down the lawn. 

"Let me come with you. I-" "I need to be alone, I'm sorry." "Ski, please. I'm not going to let you be alone right now, okay? I can't... I love you." And the tears start rolling once again. "No. No Nathan. You don't get to do that to me. You know I'm in a bad place... I can't deal with this too!" I cry out. He gives me a look that says I just broke his heart in two. But I can't take back what I said.

 I walk down that dead-end road towards the stables: My place of solitude and peace. Entering the rusty iron gates, now covered in ice and snow. I've always loved coming here. Ever since I was a little girl, this place has been my sanctuary.  

In the summer, I would sit on the dock by the lake adjacent to the stables. And in the winter, I'd bundle up and huddle in the stables with the horses. Of course, there's no horses here anymore. Once we all reached adolescence, my parents decided to sell the horses, given that we had "no interest" in them. 

I run my hand along the platinum plated plaque tha reads "Midnight." She was a gorgeous black Mustang, and she was my favorite. I smile at the memories of riding her, with Noey by my side. I realize that this will never be the same. I'll never be able to ride with her again... She'll never go to prom, or graduate. Why did you do it, Noey? 

I start to sob and I can't seem to stop. I let go of every bit of sadness and frustration I have left in my body. I scream until I'm hoarse and nothing changes. I feel as if the world has stopped turning. 

"Ski?" I dry my tears and turn to face the person that can't take a hint. "Why do you insist on not listening to me?" Nate smirks and walks closer slowly. "Please just leave, Nate! I have to be alone!" "But you need someone right now..." I start to cry harder and harder, losing my breath. I collapse, and my vision starts to go black. The next thing I know, Nathan has his arms around me and telling me to breathe. "Open your eyes, Ski. Look at me and breathe." My body starts to shake, but my breathing slows down. I look into his eyes, and all I see is hurt and concern for me. "Inhale, exhale. Come on, you're doing good, Baby, just breathe." After a minute, my breathing is back to normal and I'm back on my feet. "Thanks," I say, wiping the tears away. "Anytime," he says, kissing my forehead. I don't look at him, and just turn and keep walking down the path past the stable. Nathan catches up and asks, " Mind if I join?" "Well, after you just seeing me explode, I think it'll be fine." We smile in sync and keep walking. "So, what makes these stables so precious?" My eyes start to burn, threatening to release a flood of tears yet again. I shut them tightly, then look up at Nate. "Noey..." Nate gives me a questioning look. "My little sister..." He grabs  my hand and holds it tightly. "She's in a better place, Baby," he says quietly. "But... How could she do this to me?" He doesn't say anything, he just walks with me in silece. It's peaceful.

After we walk for a few minutes, I stop and hug him. "Thank you for not listening to me," I mumble into his chest. He hugs me tighter. "Of course, Baby Girl. I'll always be here for you."

And then, as if it wasn't perfect timing.. my phone goes off. I pull away from Nathan and yank my phone out of my back pocket. I look down and see a text from Alec. "What does he want?" Nate asks. "He's being a big brother and trying to find me like normal." I don't reply and stick my phone back into my pocket. "I'm so pissed off at him!" I scream, not aimed towards anyone. "What did he do?" "He knew about Noey for more than two weeks and he never mentioned a thing until now." Nathan's facial expression softens. "I'm sure he was just trying to protect you, Darling." "Yeah... I'm sure that was it," I mumble sarcastically. 

My phone vibrates in my pocket once again. "Fucking Alec, I swear to God..." I grumble, tugging my phone out again and clicking the power button, causing it to light up. The name on the lock screen doesn't match the accused.

It says Keiran. I try not to let my facial expression give it away as I open his message. 

K: Hello, Beautiful. How are things going at home?

I lock my phone, putting it back in my pocket. "Who was it?" Nate asks curiously. "Just Alec, begging me to come home," I say casually. "Well, you should." I shrug. "I really don't want to go home and deal with them." "Ski, it is too cold to stay out here, even if it is just to avoid your family," he says sternly. I glare at him, even though I know he is right. "Fine," I say, sighing and turning toward the gate. He follows closely behind me like a solemn guard (lap) dog. 

Within minutes, my homestead is in full view again. It takes all I have not to run upstairs to my old bedroom and leave Nathan in the dust.

Once I'm close enough to the house, I walk up the brick stairs slowly. Hoping that everyone else is preoccupied, I open the front door, dart upstairs and into my room, shutting the door and locking it behind me. I open Keiran's message and immediately respond.

M: They're all right. How are things going with you?

Normally I'm ready to get away from my family for different reasons, but for once... I couldn't wait to get back to college, to see where things lead with Keiran.