5sos •boyxboy• oneshots

I'm Too Numb To Feel Right Now )) Cashton

I'm too numb to feel right now

Cashton

I apologize for my lack of writing my own stuff but it's something personal but the next few will be original promise :)

creds: AO3 username: cashton💕

____________

Calum doesn't like many people. He doesn't like showing his feelings to others. He doesn't like not being liked. Sometimes, he also doesn't like himself. He does like his bandmates though, all of them in their own ways. Sometimes, he doesn't think they like him as much as he wants them to though. He doesn't like that either. He doesn't like how needy he gets towards them either. Long story short, he doesn't like a lot of things but his bandmates aren't one of those things. And sometimes he needs his bandmates more than he wants to need them.

It happens often. He gets scared and insecure and needy. Calum hates himself for it. The rest of the boys love him even more for it.

Calum stared at his phone, biting his lower lip while he sat back in the dressing room, ignoring everyone else in the room while he was adrift in his thoughts. His phone, just a ploy to try and avoid conversation. This happens quite often, one night out of the week as a proper guess. He doesn't know why but sometimes he just gets lost in his own thoughts. Sometimes it's almost like he's drowning in them, others he doesn't mind them. All of the others boys had noticed immediately, but wouldn't say anything yet. They gave him some space until they had privacy to where they could do whatever they pleased without receiving questionable glances or it becoming a trending topic on twitter. They all watched him though, each giving him a quick glimpse every few minutes to see if his demeanor has changed, even in the slightest. It didn't.

Luke was the first to sit next to Calum, their knees bumping each one another while he sat down, biting his lip while staring at the side of Calum's head letting out a quiet sigh while watching. He smiled softly and looked at him intently, sitting much closer than necessary. Calum sighed and scooted away, frowning slightly at his phone.

Michael was the next to try and get Calum to do anything rather than sit and sulk, staring off into space. Their team had all went off to do something somewhere else so Michael sat on his lap, nuzzling into his neck gently, "Cal.." He mumbled softly, sighing quietly.

Calum sighed softly and bit his lip, "Not right now." He said quietly, practically incoherent to anyone other than Michael while he pushed him away gently, looking down at his lap.

Ashton was the last to try while the other to watched in jealously while he got Calum up. Ashton sighed and held him close while they walked out of the dressing room while the younger clung onto the eldest tightly, as if his was life was depending on it.

The four boys went out the back entrance, avoiding the fans as much as possible while they all quickly got into the car. Michael and Luke tweeting small apologies to all of the fans although they didn't feel guilty in the slightest given the circumstances. When they got to the hotel, they also did the same thing. They went through the back entrance, each of them keeping their eyes on Calum while they walked towards their shared hotel rooms. Ashton practically carried the slightly taller boy upstairs, sighing and setting him on the younger's bed. Calum remained pliant while Michael helped Ashton take his shoes off, biting his lip while he watched the boy.

The purple haired boy sat on the bed next to Calum, pulling Calum closer to him, tucking him under his arm while he pushed his hair out of his eyes, looking down at him with a somewhat fond look in his eyes. Calum nuzzled into his neck and let out a slow, shaky breath while his eyes fluttered shut, his lower lip being tucked under his teeth while he thought to himself, meanwhile gripping onto the collar of Michael's shirt while he let out a small, practically inaudible whimper but all of them heard it. The silence that followed afterwards was damn near painful. Luke quickly moved to take up the part of the bed that was unoccupied before, he placed his hand on Calum's forehead gently and slowly ran his fingers through his hair soothingly, humming softly into the boy's ear. Ashton ran his fingertips up and down Calum's arms lightly, trailing them from the center of his bicep to his lower forearm before back again. Michael held Calum into his chest, his long arms wound around him tightly while he ran his own fingers up and down his back, similar to Ashton's movements.

They all kept up their actions, Luke's soft hums filling the silence which progressed into him singing quietly. Calum let out a small sigh, his breathing growing even while he drifted off into a light sleep,the boys all watching him with fond eyes and sweet smiles. They slowed their actions and smiled, none of them pulling away from each other. Calum nuzzled into his neck and let out a slow, shaky breath while his eyes fluttered shut, his lower lip being tucked under his teeth while he thought to himself, meanwhile gripping onto the collar of Michael's shirt while he let out a small, practically inaudible whimper but all of them heard it. The silence that followed afterwards was damn near painful. Luke quickly moved to take up the part of the bed that was unoccupied before, he placed his hand on Calum's forehead gently and slowly ran his fingers through his hair soothingly, humming softly into the boy's ear. Ashton ran his fingertips up and down Calum's arms lightly, trailing them from the center of his bicep to his lower forearm before back again. Michael held Calum into his chest, his long arms wound around him tightly while he ran his own fingers up and down his back, similar to Ashton's movements.

They all kept up their actions, Luke's soft hums filling the silence which progressed into him singing quietly. Calum let out a small sigh, his breathing growing even while he drifted off into a light sleep,the boys all watching him with fond eyes and sweet smiles. They slowed their actions and smiled, none of them pulling away from each other.

Calum smiled to himself when he woke up in a tangled in limbs, most of whose weren't his and he couldn't tell who they belonged to. He didn't really care either. He liked it actually, a lot. The boy sighed and snuggled into Michael's chest even more, while he put his arms over Luke's which were wrapped around his waist. He sighed contently and grabbed Ashton's hand, lacing his fingers with the eldest's even longer fingers. Calum smiled and looked at the three boys all curled around him with an affectionate grin on his face.

He didn't like many people, he was a very reserved person who liked to keep to himself, he liked his bandmates though, and he knows they like him back. He suddenly felt a lot better.
______________________

Requests??