A Fine Line Between Love and Hate

Chapter 4

Matt's POV

Her fragile body looked lifeless underneath me. My beautiful angel. I took a deep breath in trying to contain the tears prickling at the back of my eyes. I pulled out of her carefully, slipping on a pair of boxers and went to the bathroom. It was a complete mess. The door was broken into pieces and off of it's hinges due to my forceful kick. I grabbed a small towel off of the rail they were hanging on and ran the cold water, wetting the towel.

I walked back into the bedroom and it broke my heart seeing her like this but my anger just got to much and I had to get it out. I picked her up bridal style and pulled her further up the bed so her head was now resting on the pillows. I started to wipe away the blood that was on her face. A few tears slipped past my eyes and I quickly wiped them away.

Once all the blood was gone I grabbed a clean underwear and put them on her gorgeous figure been carefully not to hurt her anymore than I had already done. I grabbed one of my shirts and pulled it over her body. I grabbed the bed sheets and pulled it over her. She looked so peaceful and more tears ran down my face. I would give anything for her to love me like I do. Maybe that's why all this anger is here because I know deep down she doesn't. She looks at me in disgust and runs off to Brian. After all he is the better man but it would kill me to see her slip through my fingers.

I gave her a gentle kiss on the lips and mumbled, "I'm so sorry." I wish that I could control everything. The thought of her and Brian made my skin crawl. It broke me just thinking about them being intimate, something that only I should be doing with her and I can't even get that right. "I love you so much," I whispered. I felt disgusted with myself. I shouldn't be capable of this. I had actually broken her and I knew it was too late to fix her now.

I walked away from her unconscious body and went down the stairs ignoring the mess on the way. I went straight to the kitchen and grabbed a beer. I chugged it down, letting the cool liquid calm me down and ease my shaking hand. I took a deep breath in and I felt more tears fall down my face. Thoughts poured into my mind of Brian and I could feel my anger rising once again. My mind raced with images of him getting more than friendly with Jade and I knew that I wasn't paranoid. I saw the way he looked at her. I recognised that look because she used to look at me like that. Now, it was a look of fear and disgust. I knew I had to change that.

I walked back up the stairs and went into our bedroom, her body still lying there peacefully. I walked over to her and sat down next to her and laced our fingers together. Times like these was the only time I could truly apologise for my mistakes because I knew she wouldn't know what I've said to her.

"Jade, I am really sorry for doing this to you. I know you wont be able to hear me but in a way that's a good thing because I can't face seeing your eyes that hold so much pain and hate for me. It kills me knowing that you don't want to be with me. It hurts you know. Brian loves you and anybody can see it but why him? He's happily married. I don't want to lose you to him. I love you and I am so sorry," I told her. I felt a bit better to get it off of my chest. I gently placed my lips over hers and kissed her, longing for the feeling of her kissing me back.

I got up and let her fragile body rest. I walked away knowing I was a horrible man.

Jade's POV

The darkness pulled me into a terrifying and relentless dream. It took over my mind. The image of Matt hitting me over and over again with a look of hate burning in his hazel eyes. He hit me hard sending my vision blurry and a blood flowing down my face. I heard his sinister laugh ring through my ears which hauled my back into consciousness.

I sprung up, sweat dripping down my face and my body riddled with pain. I winced as my ribs ached from the beating they had got and I was sore. My thighs burned and my lower back stung. I shuddered at the thought of what Matt did to me. He genuinely scared me and I knew I had to get away but something in me still hoped he would change into the person he was before. I wanted the old Matt back, the loving, caring, sweet man that captured my heart. I needed him and a part of me still loved and cared for him deeply.