In the Shadow of Lights

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"Namjoon! Why the hell where you with him again?!" Jung Hoseok said once Namjoon had stepped through the door. Yeesh. Give him a break. He didn't even step throught the door before Hobi started nagging him.

"Hoseok hyung... I was shopping and hanging out with Taehyung. Don't worry about me ok?" He said with a soft smile. Unfortunately for him, Hobi could read the other like a book.

"Tch. I've known you for forever idiot. And of course I'm going to worry about you! Whenever you come back from seeing that ass, you have a certain look on your face... Can't you see how 'Yoongi' is hurting you? Joonie... I won't stand for you being hurt repeatedly! Over and over! Aren't you sick of this as well?!" Hoseok said raising his voice a bit.

"Hyung. What I do and don't do is none of your concern. Please... Just leave me alone. Do I bother you about your problems with Jin? No! You don't have that right to control my life! You aren't my mom!" Joon yelled out and he went to his room, slamming the door shut.

Yes... He knew this was wrong. And he have expressed it many times. Many many times... But each time he just pushed the thoughts away from his mind and continued on. His love was strong and it would not be diminshed by the dark shadows of Yoongi's heart as well as his own.

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Four weeks. It had been four weeks since they had last talked. And to be frank, Joon thought the other would actually talk to him during those weeks. But again.. His hopes were shot down continuously. But he's used to it. How could he not?

But he was getting anxious. What if something bad happened to his hyung? What if he disappeared again? But why are these thoughts coming...? Since when did he care where Yoongi was? Well... Its been a while... And the pattern was messed up... Maybe he should check up on him...

Deciding on checking up on him, he grabbed his keys and ran out of the apartment. Its wasn't a long drive to yoongi's house, so he got there in no time.

But as soon as he pulled up to the parking lot, something in his gut told him not to go in. Don't see the horrors that could happen. But he just had to know if the guy was alright. Sure, he could have just called, or a simple text... But his fingers wouldn't work. They wouldn't let him dial the number..

Gathering up his courage he stepped out of the car and hesitantly walked over to the door. His legs felt like jelly and his heart felt like a humming bird. It was just a simple check up... Nothing to worry about.

As he got to the door, his arms wouldn't move. Nothing seemed to be working for him at all. Right when he needed the courage... All of left his body. But, it was always that way with Yoongi. Anything he said, anything he did, or even a slight touch... It could make him into a sobbing mess or the most happiest person in the world.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the door opened unexpectedly. Out came a small boy. His hair was tousled and his clothes were a wreck... And were those hickies?! But as soon as he looked at the face his nervousness was replaced his anger and hurt.

Jimin

"What are you doing here?" Namjoon said quietly, laced with malice.

"Hmph. Don't I have the right to go were I please Namjoon?" Jimin said with a scoff.

"Listen here you little shit-" Namjoon was cut off by a hand on his shoulder. Yoongi... He looked equally as Jimin. No.. He wouldn't have... Would he?

"Namjoon? Why are you here?" Yoongi asked with surprise. Wow... That was a lot of emotion. Coming from the older of course.

"Yoongi~ I'm going to go." Jimin said in a cheerful voice and just left. Just like that...

"Hyung... Can I come inside for a minute?" Namjoon asked softly, his anger replaced with that nervouness again.

"I'm... Sure. Ok." Yoongi said with the same voice as all the other times.

Joon walked in and breathed in that mint scent that Yoon always had... It was calming and relaxing.. It made Joon want to stay here and breath in the scent all day.

"What are you doing here?" Yoongi asked, sitting on the couch.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing... I haven't seen you in four weeks hyung.. It made me worried." Joon said shyly.

"Well I'm fine. Is that all you came here for?" Yoongi asked taking out a lighter and a cigarette.

"Wah~ Hyung. I didn't know you smoked!" Joon said in amazement. True, after the three years of knowing the guy, he never once seen him smoke.

"I- oh... I've smoked all this time Joon. I just.. Never wanted you to find out. Pretty careless of me right? You won't find me any different... Right?"

"Aish.. Hyung. Did you really think smoking would make me change my mind about you? That's absurd." Joon said starting to play with the hem of his jacket. "It would explain why you always smelled like it.. But you always had an excuse to why.. Well.. Um... I guess its good you're ok."

Yoongi didn't say anything. He just shook his head and lit the cancer stick and took a long puff.

"Yea. Now... Are you ok?"

Joon was startled by the sudden question.

"W-What? Hyung... What kind of question is that?" He asked in confusion. Why now of all times...

"I'm just asking. All you have to say is 'I'm fine and you?'" Yoongi said with an annoyed tone.

"Actually, I'm feeling horrible lately, but other than that, I'm ok.. As long as you are, I'll be fine." He said with a wide smile.

"You're so stupid Namjoon..." Yoongi said while flicking some ashes into a plant.

Namjoon didn't answer, as he already knew this. He knew it yet... He loved this feeling. Craved it really. He just wanted to spend time with with his love. With that, he'll be filled. Even if it was just for an hour, a couple mintues, even a few seconds.

"Do you know Jimin?"

He could've fell out the chair right there and then.

"H-he is that person that broke up with me.. Three years ago. The person who made me almost walk into that river..." He said quietly. "Why was he here?"

"What? Can I not have a simple hookup once in a while? Huh? Do you want me to tell you every single person I have over?  Is that what you you want Namjoon? You're not my parent. Not even my boyfriend." Yoongi said while standing up, visibly shaking.

"Get the hell out. Don't you dare try to fucking call me." He said.

"W-wait. Hyung! I didn't mean it like that-"

"No. Can't you see? No matter what you do, you can't help me."

To Be Continued...