The Cancer Girl

Chapter 5

Life is fragile and can stop at any moment. You always have to watch what you say, remembering that what you say to someone can be the last thing you say to them. That was probably the hardest thing to think about when I'm running down the hallway. I'm running to him, just thinking one thing. I said those things, those awful thing to the guy who has always been there for me. The guy I'm probably in love with, someone I could be with. I ruined all of it and now he could be gone forever.

I get to his room out a breath, tears running down my face. I walk in and see the nurses crowded around him. I can only see his lifeless feet.

"Clear!" One of the nurses says. O my God, it's actually happening, he could die. I see his body jolt up as the nurse presses the AED into his chest.

There was no movement, silence, it was peaceful for a moment but than you realize you best friend is gone.

"Clear!" I heard the nurse yell again. I tried to get closer but my body wouldn't let me move forward. Room was spinning and I couldn't move myself to him. I tired to, my whole body began to twist and the room was getting dark. I couldn't see anything.

That's the last thing I remember than I was back in my room. Blinking my eyes trying to figure out who was in my room. My mom, dad and Angel were standing in the corner. They were talking quietly, making sure I couldn't hear them.

I was trying to read there lips and I saw the word 'he,' and I knew they were talking about Spencer. I jolted up and tried to grab my pole and get out of there, I needed to know if he was ok.

Angel came over, trying to hold me in bed but she knew I wasn't gonna stop so she let me go. She was following slowly behind me, I passed my mom and dad. They weren't making eye contact, that worried me.

I was walking out of the room as fast as I could but it felt like I was going in slow motion, stumbling around. I got to his door way and stood there for a minute waiting, I don't know what for but I was waiting. I stepped in and felt this wait press on my shoulders.

I saw his feet first, no movement. Than his legs, no movement. Than his chest, and I saw it rise and fall again. My face lit up, I walked in fast ready to see his smile and tell him he was right, I love him and I was ready too.

But I didn't see it. His face was motionless and there was a feeding tube and breathing tube coming out of him.

Angel walked up next to me. "I'm so sorry." I knew what that meant. He was there just not there. The guy I was I love with wasn't there. He didn't even know how I felt. Those were the effects of a coma.

I walked over to him, sitting down in the chair next to him. I held on to him hand, it was cold. I just wanted to tell him, tell him he was right. I looked over at Angel, asking for a moment alone and she walked out.

"Spencer," I said hoping he might be able to hear met through the fog and effects of his coma, "I love you, you were right, now wake up so we can forgot about everything I said and you can race me in wheelchairs, steel food and drive the nurses crazy. You were right, Spencer." Tears were rolling down my face and I didn't know what to say but I needed him to know.

I sat there for a while just hoping I could be what he woke up to. Maybe he could just wake up today. To look straight into my eyes and hear me say the words I knew were true now.