Becoming Us || l.h

Chapter 19

Blake and Austin fill out my discharge paperwork, Zach helping me get ready to leave. "I'll be living here this summer so I'll be able to visit you often." He promises, handing me a bag with my clothes in it. I go into the bathroom and change, staring at myself in the mirror. My eyes had dark circles under them, my cheekbones were prominent and I just lacked color altogether. I leave, looking up at Zach. "Ready?" He asks, smiling down at me softly. I nod, following him from the room. Blake leads the way out, stopping short of the door.

"Um-" He pauses, looking back at me. "Take her out another door, I'll distract the paps." He lets out a sigh, heading out the main doors. I slump, going with Austin and Zach to the front desk to find out where another exit is. We are led down the hall to a side exit meant for workers, making our way to the car. Zach drives over to where Blake was swarmed by paparazzi, unlocking the door so he can get in. He drives us to Blake's house, letting me pack what I need.

"You ready?" Blake peeks his head into my room. I shrug, sitting on my bed. "I don't know." He comes in and sits next to me, wrapping an arm around me. "It's scary, I know, but you're stronger than you think. You've made it this far and you're in some of the hardest years of your life. Yes, you've had some setbacks and struggles, but you've pushed through. This center is just to help you feel more like yourself and find ways to cope better with the struggles. All they want to do is help you." I nod, looking down at my fingers. "I just- I do want the help, I really do, I'm just scared. "What if they are just like my last therapist or what if they judge me? What if the gossip columns catch wind of all of this and completely out me going to rehab?"

"It's okay to be scared, Dylan. This is their job and if they are judging you, let one of us know when we visit and we will talk to someone if you don't want to, or if they aren't a right match for you, ask for someone new. They have so many people there that want to help you. If the news catches wind of this, I'll handle it, I'll work with some people to make sure it gets shut down and we will figure everything out. You don't need to worry." I nod, standing. "Come here." He says, pulling me in for a hug. "You got this, Dyl, you're strong and can get through anything." I nod into his chest, hugging him tightly.

We both head back downstairs to his car, Zach and Austin getting in the backseat. I stare out the window as we drive, the car quiet. "Who all knows?" I ask, looking around at everyone. "Right now, just immediate family. Mom and dad are trying to save the rest of my tour since I just upped and left to come to see you so fuck them for not caring and I will be making sure you live with me when you are out and away from them. I will also be firing them and making sure they cannot contact you while you are here." Blake says, bitterness in his tone. I nod, picking at my nails again. He pulls into a long driveway to the facility, my heart racing more. "Is there anyone you want us to tell?" Austin asks, peeking his head up between the seats. I think for a minute, contemplating whether or not to tell Ashton. "Ashton." He nods, squeezing my arm.

I start biting my nail as we get closer, the building in the distance. "I can't do this, I'm not ready," I say, starting to cry, my stomach in my throat. "Hey, deep breaths. They just want to help you, Dylan. As you said, you want help. It's scary, and that's okay. Deep breaths." Blake says, glancing over at me before looking back at the road. I shake my head, wiping my eyes. Blake parks, looking over at me.

"Deep breath in." He says, waiting. I suck in a breath, holding it. "Now let it out slowly." I do, repeating this a few more times with him. "We will be a phone call away. Give us a call for anything. We will try to visit as much as possible, it'll be okay." He promises, smiling softly. I nod, looking up at the building. It looked nice, not like a hospital, almost more like a nice little resort getaway. Austin gets my suitcases from the trunk, all of us walking in and checking in.