Elijah Mikaelson Imagines.

Sex Joke Misunderstood + Elijah Mikaelson

Word Count: 1139

Warnings: Bad sex joke in this. Mentions; dick, blow job, and the term meat.

Prompt: "Oh this is a joke, well then yes I did." It is in the title loves, there a sex joke mentioned and Elijah misunderstands it, pretty badly too. (Set in Mystic Falls)

¶×¶×¶

You sighed as you sat in the living area of the Salvatore brothers house, it was currently three in the morning and you bored out of your mind. You couldn't sleep and you kind of expected that since you did spend most of today sleeping, the other night you and Damon had spent time drinking together- you have both become best friends and he needed someone to drink with and so did you.

Stefan walked in and looked at you raising an eyebrow "Why are you awake so early?" He asks you shrug "Can't really sleep." You answer he nods and sits down "So, how was the bar with Damon?" Stefan asks you smile widely.

"You won't believe what he did, he actually started singing he shoved some dude off the stage and sang his heart out." You and Stefan started laughing manically.

Elijah stepped in and watched you for a mere second "I hope I'm not interrupting anything." Elijah speaks up you both look over at him and shake your heads "No, no Elijah you're welcomed to join us." Stefan answers looking over at you before back to Elijah.

"Yeah, we were just talking about how Damon sang his heart out the other night." Elijah got a small smile "That doesn't seem like him." Elijah takes a seat next you joining in on the conversation.

"I think you'll find I am little out dated on the new terms and 'slang' as I have heard people call it, but I think Damon singing calls for an 'O.M.G' to be said." Elijah nods you and Stefan look at each other hiding your smiles and laughs "What?" Elijah asks making you and Stefan shake your heads.

"Nothing, Eli." You answer not noticing that you have called him 'Eli' instead of calling him 'Elijah' like you normally did.

"I believe there was something when I said that." You and Stefan laugh before nodding "Elijah, you need to pick up on our 'slang' and new terms if you wanna stick around." Stefan laughs.

"Right, I will do that." Elijah nods.

¶×¶×¶

It was a few days later after that three in the morning conversation with Elijah and Stefan has passed. You were now seated in the living with Stefan, Elijah, Damon, Elena, Jeremy, Bonnie, Caroline and Matt. You each had a drink in your hand even if it wasn't alcohol there was still a drink in everyone's hand.

"Well I think Y/n has something to share." Stefan smiles at you before glancing over at his brother "Oh yes, I do." Damon wasn't thinking of that night as he raised an eyebrow to his brother as he put his arm around Elena slightly nervous.

"Elena did you know Damon could sing 'Let It Go'?" You ask everyone started laughing "Like from that movie Frozen?" Jeremy asks.

"That's the one." You laugh Damon scowls at you and Stefan as everybody laughs, Elena looked at her boyfriend and smiled "Don't say it." Damon groaned "Well I gotta know, were you Ana or Elsa? Or both?" Everyone laughed as Damon groaned again.

"We are not drinking buddies anymore." Damon points to you "And didn't Elijah feed you?" Jeremy asks looking at you "Jer! Just cause we told you doesn't mean you ask." Bonnie smiles weakly to you.

"Yes I did I fed her my-" "Meat?" Damon wiggles his eyebrows up and down smirking at you "What? No my blood, I don't have any meat to give her?" You looked biting down on your bottom lip as everyone tried not to laugh at Elijah's reply.

"You don't? I thought you did." Elijah looked at Damon curious "Now who are we laughing at?" Damon smiles looking at you.

"Oh, this is a joke?" Everyone laughed and Elijah nodded his head "In that case I did feed her my meat." Everyone stopped as your jaw dropped and that's when everyone noticed Alaric had walked in "What?" Alaric asks confused and trying not to laugh himself.

"I did feed Y/n my meat, and she enjoyed it." Elijah nods everyone started laughing even yourself "Did she?" Damon asks laughing "Very much so." Elijah nods.

"Stop! Elijah oh my God! That is not what you think." You point to him looking at Stefan "No Y/n let him continue." Damon laughs "We are simply not drunk enough for that, this dude is completely innocent and needs to know." Alaric sighs.

"Yes he does, Y/n tell him." Jeremy hides his smile.

"But you took my meat?" Elijah questions.

"Meat means your dick, Eli! That all means I sucked your dick, I gave you a blow job! Just stop saying that." Everyone looked every where else but one another as they tried not to laugh at the look on Elijah's face.

"That's what that means?" Everyone just simply nodded as each continue to look away from one another.

"I am gonna go now, this is weird." You speak up "Yeah." Damon nods.

You disappeared into your own room and sat down "Wow.." You whisper shaking your head "I am terribly sorry for that." You look at Elijah "You need to catch up on today's terms and meanings for real." He nods "I agree, I do know what one thing means." You look at him curiously.

"Love. It means you would simply give up something for the one if it'd be your happiness for theirs, your life for theirs. You would do anything for them, you would build an empire or take down an empire you would simply do anything for the one you love." He looks at you then the window.

"I felt that once," You start quietly "Love. What a stupid thing to feel truly, it just leaves people hurt and lonely at the end." You finish "I do feel it." Elijah whispers not breaking eye contact.

"With you, I love you Y/n." You look at him and shrug "I know I feel something for you in that department, just never told you." He looks at you as if he didn't know what you meant "I love you too Elijah." He smiles "I am seriously sorry about that-"

"Elijah shut up! Forget it please." He laughs "I will try, for you." He nods.

"So is she getting the-"

"Y/n that hurt!" Damon yells up the stairs as everyone at the bottom laughs at you throwing him down the stairs "You got your ass kicked by a girl, shut up!" Elijah calls back smiling at you before kissing you gently.

¶×¶×¶

That was simply amazing, I wrote this while in school listening to Kodak Black

City girls, The Weeknd, Fetty Wap the usual.

Btw my house might be haunted because of me playing with Ouija boards and a card spirit game.

XOXO Danosaurious