I can't share this with anyone, so I thought why not write about it, where no one knows me, and some can relate. this is about anorexia, it will be triggering, suicide might come up, this is basically me sharing my thought's, so it will be dark. but...
I have never felt fatter then I do now, I have no one except ana,
when I look at myself in the mirror it kills me. when I look at the scale I feel like crippling into a heap on the floor and just cry and cry until the voice inside my head,----telling me I'll never be skinny, never be enough, never be pretty, that I'm fat and it's my fault cause I should have stayed hungry a little while longer, exercised a little harder pushed a little further. ---is gone
the number on my scale not only shows my weight, it shows my self-worth. I read that somewhere once, I relate so much it hurts.
I am lost, fading into nothing, and still,
it's not enough
don't worry, I'll make it better
~sincerely yours, Ana
please, if this triggers you don't read it. if you are looking into this cause you're curious as to how someone with anorexia nervosa thinks, leave now before it's too late for you. save yourself from a life of calorie counting and endless self-hatred
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