I hate myself, but I can't tell you that cause you will tell me not to, but you don't understand. You don't understand the pain and the hate I had to go through every single day. You don't know what I went through. You don't know how much I want to love myself, but I can't. When you are brought down instantly because of your appearance you will start to look at yourself differently. You can't even look at yourself in the mirror without thinking that they are right, that maybe you really look the way they told you.
When you are treated like nothing it doesn't hurt anymore, you will get used to it. You don't even care what they are saying anymore you just nod your head and go on because you are hurting so much and you are broken already and there is nothing that can make you feel worse.
And no matter how many people will tell you otherwise. Those doubts will always be here. Not everything that is broken can be fixed, especially not the soul. You can't change the way I look at myself it has been going on for too long.
And even when I find somebody that makes me feel good about myself, they leave me after some time because I am not good enough for them.
