Princess of SAMCRO

Away and Alone

As I felt someone grab me and realized it was Gemma. We held each other as we both cried. As the van pulled out of the lot I feel to the ground screaming out in anguish. That was the last I was going to hug and kiss the beautiful soul that was Jackson Teller, he wasn't going to make this. My dad and brother being gone made it all worse as I felt someone touch me as Lyla gripped my shoulder along with Gemma who was sobbing as well. Lowen had a glare on her face as she walked to Sthal who gave her one of the blue folders.

"You're clients will be out in three years. If they don't kill anyone parole in 14 months." She said getting in her car and riding off.

JAX POV

I sat in the back of the van waiting and praying this idea went how we had planned. What bother me the most was Nikole, the tears I couldn't get her face out of my head.

"All you see is her face isn't it?" I looked up meeting Deacon's eyes before I looked back down. I swear I could hear Nikole's heart break. The way she clung to me sobbing as they carted me off. I looked up hearing honking making eye contact with Clay and Deacon. That sound from the prospects meant everything went how it was supposed to, Jimmy and Sthal were dead. I would be seeing Nikole is 14 months. We all started laughing, even the guard was looking at us weird.

"Deacon." I said making everyone look at me.

"What."

"When we get out." I said taking a deep breath looking up at his face before continuing. "I want to marry your daughter."

"WHAT!, Hell no!" Dean said looking at me

"Dean!" I said looking at him "I know it's your sister, I know you are pissed that we ended up together but please man. Your one of my best friends you know that I love her. She is my entire world, she makes every day worth living just to see the smile on her face. If you wanna fight me do it, what every it takes for you to realize I love your sister and am never letting her go. Unless she tells me."

"Ask in 14 months asshole." Deacon said as Dean looked shocked

"Dad, what the fuck."

"Dean, they love each other ok. We might not like it but they do, have you ever seen your sister act like that. She literally just almost went to jail with us attacking Sthal because she did that. She sided with him in seconds even lashing out at us. I don't like the whole secrecy shit they did but even you got to admit he has been there for her always. I know you care for her Dean but she's happy and that is what matters the most."

"I'm still kicking your ass." Dean said looking at me.

"As long as I marry her do what you want."

NIKOLE POV

I was trying to do laundry but so far all I managed to do was make myself cry because I smelled Jax's shirt. I was going through his bag from Ireland when I saw letters and a note. Maureen gave him the letters JT sent her. Jax had briefly filled me in on the whole having a sister thing. I didn't say anything but it dawned on me why my dad had been looking from Trinity to Jax when we first got there. He could see it. I got up as I heard knocking, getting to the door I saw the two prospects.

"Sorry to bother you, Jax said to give you this and tell you to burn it when you were done."

"What? What is this?"

"We don't know." Phil said "He just said we needed to give you it."

"Thanks." I said as they left. I walked to Jax's room sitting on the bed. I had his hoodie on and it smelled just like him. How was I going to survive a life that didn't have him in it. I opened his letter already wanting to cry as I saw his handwriting.

Hey gorgeous,

If you are reading this it means Sthal and Jimmy are both dead; and the club will be doing short time. I am so sorry it had to be this way Nikole, I know this has been painful, especially today, having me Deacon and Dean all leaving and you thinking I was a rat killed me. I'm not sure how your reaction is going to be to all this so I am sorry. We all decided club vote less ears the better, if you and Gemma had known more you would have been an accessory had things went bad. We needed the most genuine reaction from both you and my mother. I am sorry for the pain I had to cause you to get it.  I would never turn on this club or my, our family.

Nikole I want to thank you for not just being my best friend, but being the love of my damn life. You took on Abel as your own, stepping into the role of a mother head first without any questions even though he wasn't yours. You turned my house into a home and I can't thank you enough for loving not just my son but me as well. I want you to hang in there for me, hopefully we can get visitation and you might come see me once or twice. Nikole you mean the world to me and I can't thank you or tell you how much you mean to me, these next months without in my arms are going to kill me but I know with you in my corner I can make it through anything. Take care of my boy and my shit for me, and don't let anyone hurt that bike. I love you Nik

Love Always Jackson.

By the time I was done with his letter I couldn't stop crying. He was ok, they were ok. I quickly remembered the words and burned the letter. Part of me was pissed at Jax and my dad and brother but I knew they didn't have a choice and I guarantee they felt shitty about it. I smiled feeling like I could get shit down and finished laundry. They way Gemma was doing I let Abel stay the night with her, at like midnight I heard a knock as Chibs came in.

"You ok?" I immediately hugged him

"Are you ok?"

"Better now luv, better."