Black to Purple, Purple to Magenta | A Prinxiety Sanders Sides Fanfiction

🖤Chapter 14: Aftermath

TW: body image, self-deprecating thoughts, b/limia, vomiting

🖤Chapter 14: Aftermath-
Morality can't wait any longer.

Virgil/Anxiety's POV:

As soon as I took one bite, I felt nausea sweep over me.

It was good, it was made by Patton... and I guess me? Don't get me wrong, it really was good, but...

Ignoring my queasiness, I continued to take down a few bites.

I wanted to break down right then and there.

But I bottled it.

Keep eating and you'll turn even more fat.

F̧̖̺͙̦͈̓̋ͯ̌̅̀̕o͛̓̂̿͌̉͛̎̀̋r͎̣͖̥̪̩͎̹̆͆ͭ̒̒̂̿ͨ ͋͌̌̑̑̽ͮ̑̄̅ͦ͛̆̚m̗͕͈̠̅̍̋̇y͂̐̽ͦ̀̍̊̀ͣ͏̢̞͖̥͇̙͓̤͇̲͡ ̼̽͞s̛̞̱̩̖ű͌ͥ̀̎̏ͤ̎̐̀ͨͤ̄͋ͭb̜͓̹ͤͩ́̕co̵̗̥̪̰̬͍͕̭̮͓ͪ͌͆ͤ̅̃ͨͦ͒̾ņ̘̩̍̆͘scį͗̀ͬͬ̿̒̈͒̈̚͡o̷̯͍͎̤̩͈͖̤̺͈̼̠̳̻̓̍͆̐ͥ̂̂͆ͩͬ̓̎̏̎̚ͅu͆̀̀͋̉̅͂ͣ̌ͧ̚͏̪̠̼̟͖̯͇͖̮̺̝s̬͇̱̖̭̻͉̹̯̳̱̟̝ͥ̔́̎̂̌̆͆ͬ̇ͦ́̄͑͋ͅͅ,̀҉͟ ͈͈̮̽̊́́̕y̳͖̠͍͘ou͇͈̣͙̙̭'̶̨̺̠͓̥̮͇̪͈̭̯͇̓ͯͣͦ͗͑̃ͣͨͧ̾͢r̶̶̿̓̈́̆̿̌̓͞e̺̙̠͙̝̝͍͇͖̟ͅ ͈̄a̡̨̹̻͇͓͓̺̼̰̪ͨ̓̄ͩ͒͑̍̅̐ ̴́͢diͬ͐͑̾c̭̫̣͉͔̪̭̞̫̟ͅk̰͈̹͉̤ͫ̈̐̾̇͞.̠̻̬͙̳̗̠͖̤͎͓͕͚̞ͅ

Exactly. I'm you after all.

F̝ų̞̪̹̙̘͎͈̓ͨ͒͆ͫ̃̍ͬ͜ͅc̴̀̏̊̉̌͊͆͠͏̝͓̱͖̠̤̼k̹̰̘̲̙̠͍̖̳̗̻͛͊͐̓̑̍̅ͬ̀͒ͫ ̠̗̬͎̂̒͗̂̾ͅy̵͑̓̋͐͐̎ͤ̍ͨͪ̏̍̚ọ̣͙͍̆ͫ̔̓͞ú͘.ͫ̂̌ͥ̐ͦͨ͋ͣͤ̽́

'Thank god this is not one of those 'Virgil is being used by *insert Depression or Deceit here*' stories on Wattpad.'

'My subconscious is just a dick.'

"Anx?"

"Huh?"

"Sorry, you just blanked out for a second," Patton gave me a halfhearted smile.

I felt small voices in the back of my head, causing my mind to feel fuzzy and my body feeling drained.

I looked down at my food, my eyes widening.

I ate 1/4 of the plate.

Geez, did I feel horrible right now. No wonder I blanked out.

'I ate a pancake yesterday and now I can't even eat eggs, bacon, and sausage? Even if it was not even half the plate?'

'IneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowupIneedtothrowup!'

"I have to go," I blankly said, emotionless. Roman and Logan didn't pay any attention, though Patton gave me a worried gaze.

I stood up, walking half-way on the stairs before swiftly sprinting toward my room's bathroom.

I felt tears forming on the edge of my eyes as I bent over the toilet.

Dry heaving, thoughts tainted my mind, a visual forming in my head.

'Worthless,' the word formed into a knife, stabbing at my heart, slowly cracking it.
'Ugly,' once again, my heart cracked once more.
'Mistake'
'Useless'
'Disorder,' my heart shattered, the pieces falling down to the black void. Nothing left.

Tears were making a waterfall down my face.

"Anxiety!"

'How did I not notice his footsteps?'

W̯̹̬͍̹̺͓̭̜̖̹͎̗͚̃͐ͪͪ̆̊̊ͦ̽̓̅ͭ̒͐͗ͅh̟̥͓̘͉͔̤͓̣̝̭͛̃ͨ̎̍͋̾͒̉ͦͨ͠y̪̤̭̲̣̗̹ͥͬ͗͋͌͐̐ ̤̥̰̠̹͓̯͍̗̲̻̅́̄̾̍̊̅͐̿ͣͨmͯ́ͭ̀͑̉̌̂̑͐ͥ͑҉̪̲̦͉͎͙̠̣̬̲̫̟e̟̠?ͤ͗ͨ͆͋̿̉̅̇͋̔̍̅ͪ͟

~Timeskip~

The past few minutes was a haze, but it seemed like Patton had cleaned up. "Anxiety?" Patton whispered, even if we were alone in my room.

"Anxiety, you have to tell me. Everything. Please..."

I still didn't say anything.

"I'm worried about you, Anxiety... If you're not ready to tell me, I understand, but-"

"I'll tell you just- I-," Patton looked at me to continue.

"Just... don't tell anyone, okay? P-please?"

"I won't. I promise," I knew Patton didn't break promises. He gave me a reassuring look, convincing me he wasn't going to tell anyone.

"From the beginning?" Patton spoke again.

"What do you mean?" confused on what he meant by 'beginning'.

"From when you first formed? I didn't even get to know you at all then..." he gave a sad laugh.

"Well..."

"Wait..." Patton interrupted. He walked over to the room's door, grabbing the knob and locking it. He turned around and smiled, once again, at me.

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea..."

Patton walked back over, plopping on the bed.

"Don't you need to wash dishes? Logic and Princey are probably done with breakfast..."

"It's fine, I'll do it later. Making sure my son is okay is more important."

I smirked fondly, "I'm not your son." (Hehe, Hamiltrash?)

"Nah, I think you are!" we both chuckled before going back to serious moods.

'This is going to be a while...'

🖤

A/N:
Patton's POV next chapter to clear things up, though you can probably figure it out. The next, next chapter will be a serious talk.😉

You guys might need to wait a while for magenta...😅

Also, wait... am I seeing correctly? Do I need glasses?

Already? How? Wait, what?!
?!?!!!??!?????!?!?!?!??!!?!!!!??!?!??!!?!!??