Letters from India - Part 2

59. The Mandir is True Darshan - June 1993

The Mandir is True Darshan

June 26, 1993

Prasanthi Nilayam

Dear Parents,

Divya conveys her namaskars. I hope you are all happy and healthy there.

At the moment I am sitting in the hot sun in lines, after putting on the sunscreen you so kindly sent. We spend ½ hour in the lines in the sun, then almost two or 2½ hours inside the compound waiting for Swami, usually there, too, in the direct sun. What to do? To sit in the shade would mean far-away Darshan!

Although the Mandir is blood-splattered (an expression – it’s clean now), still it is great Darshan when He sits in the chair for bhajan. Some people still won't go inside, including Amma. They are too hurt. But if Swami is acting normal and going in, why shouldn’t we?

For several days, in bhajan Swami’s hair kept blowing in His face! Most of the bhajan He kept picking unruly hairs out of His nose, eyes, cheek and mouth! It was a funny play to see! He was delighting us by pretending that His full concentration was on the physical plane, in getting the tickling single hairs off His face.

One day, the whole left side of His hair blew over the left side of His face and refused to be tamed, so poor Swami had to put the hair in its rightful place and keep his whole hand on it the full bhajan! When He got up, that side of His hair was all smushed up. :-) But today’s bhajan He was like God – He waved both His hands a lot, closed His eyes, and sometimes remained completely motionless, looking like Bliss Itself. To me, the Mandir is the true Darshan.

Rains have decreased lately, but weather is still hot (while in the sun like we are) and sticky. In the room it’s not so hot, we don’t use the cooler anymore. But they say in winter it can be used with hot water so I wait to see if it really puts out hot breeze in the freeing winter nights here!

Before, in lines, the volunteers had the irritating habit of having four or eight lines go in at once, so you can imagine the pushing and stuffing in of hundreds of devotees at once into a small gate! I could never understand why they did that. But now, we all have to go in one by one through the metal detectors. It is a lot more pleasant even though it takes a lot more time for everyone to go in.

Amma is feeing better for the last three days or so.

Dad, when one has a spiritual base in life, thinks of God and even has a guiding guru and sadhana techniques to practice, how can one be enmeshed in the world? It is our mind and heart that matters, not so much outward actions. I am very happy that the Lord is working through you to help and inspire so many students, especially in the difficult ‘Independent Study’ students. It is a great seva! I am glad that the Lord is giving you rest this summer. It seems to me that you worked very hard, teaching all summer in addition to the school year also.

I am sorry to hear about your foot Dad, is it better now? Any mention of foot troubles reminds me vividly of the swollen foot I had, and the doctor who delighted in slicing with sharp knives! Then me limping about with a bloodstained wrapping on my foot - uck!

Yes, Amma’s two great-granddaughters are disastrous! Wherever they go it looks like a cyclone has hit. And always so loud! Either talking or crying constantly. In comparison are Amma’s two great-grandsons (age 3 and four months). They are so quiet and contented, like their mother (Pushpita, Amma’s grandson’s wife). How everyone is different; even from birth everyone has their own distant personalities.

Yes, since you sent the Lessons over two years ago, I have been practicing SRF Exercises, meditation and Kriya Yoga. For awhile I could manage only once a day; and practice became completely obstructed when I got typhoid and measles. Since about 8 months now I’ve been practicing twice a day. Because of my schedule it is difficult, but it’s too important to miss. One may think of God and offer all to Him throughout the day – but one also needs to sit quietly, forget the world, and be immersed in the Inner World. Until, that is, one can be in bliss, in samadhi, constantly even while working in the world!