lost | the hunger games

• iv •

❝ghosts don't haunt people--their memories do.❞

ruby daly, the darkest minds

☾

Mags must've come into my room early in the morning to set up my outfit. When I woke up on the couch the car was empty and there was no sign that Finnick had been there the night before. Keeping the blanket wrapped around me, I walked back into my room, where on the untouched bed sat a simple outfit of black pants and a [rather expensive] silk camisole.

I sighed, knowing that this would be the least Capitol-like I'd be wearing in public the entire trip. Reluctantly, I put the blanket aside and went to the bathroom to shower and get ready for arrival. I had no idea how to do my own hair, other than twisting it, so I just left it down, straight and glossy.

Finnick, Mags, and Annie were all sitting in the last car, the green room car is what I liked to call it. So much natural light, and the least bit Capitol-like extravagant car by far on this train. It was simply just a soft bench and some pillows wrapped against the glass walls. Annie sat next to Finnick, freshly groomed in fancy clothing, as was Mags. Finnick looked just like he always did since he was always with the Capitol.

Whether it be in front of the camera or with a citizen of the Capitol, it didn't matter. I knew all about Finnick's job and the terrible things it's done to him. The first time I actually talked with Finnick about it was a few weeks after my mom died.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Finnick asked me.

We were out on the porch of the beach house my mother's family owned, the house she grew up in. It was a lonely house now. I had no grandparents and my other was the only child to survive the Games. Seemed my family had strong luck in being chosen as tribute.

"Now what?" I asked, staring out into the ocean. "What do I do now? I'm ready to move on, I just . . . I can't. I don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do."

For once, in the entire year and a half that I'd known Finnick Odair personally, he was at a loss for words.

Picking at the chipping wood on the rail, I realized that my mother was the only thing that differed me from Finnick. Our little sweet duo reputation that made the Capitol gush was the only thing separating our situations. What if President Snow decided that it was time I stopped being the shy, sweet little girl that I was known for and become more like Finnick was to the Capitol? Get a profit out of it?

"What are you thinking about? There's something other than your mom on your mind I can tell," Finnick said, noticing my expression.

"We're not that different, you and I," I said. I turned to face him. "When you were my age you were almost exactly like me. What happened after you won the games? A little while after that?"

He realized what I was talking about. "We are dif—"

"The only thing that made me different was the mother-daughter gig and now my mom is gone. What if, what if now that she's gone President Snow thinks I'm better use to him selling—"

"Hey," Finnick cut me off firmly. He bent down to my level, put both hands on my shoulders, and looked me strongly in the eye. I had never seen such a determined and serious look on his face before and it sort of scared me. "I will never, let that happen to you. You won't end up like me, Pallas. I don't care how old you get or how much those stupid Capitol officials are willing to pay—we already have money, We're already keeping the press happy and they already have me. They will not take you too. I won't let them. I promise, Pallas."