i'm not the prettiest flower but i'll do

without emily, is there even a reason to fight anymore?

mood: gone too soon- simple plan

Saturday, October 7th 7:15 am

Five hours later Louis' alarm went off, muffled from being under his pillow, but the vibrations against his head woke him up and though the noise was quiet, it caused a pounding sensation in his head. He shut off the alarm but stayed in bed with his eyes squeezed closed, snuggling closer into his mattress and pulling his comforter tighter around his body trying to relax. But when he tried to pull his comforter up and over his head, he yanked something with him and immediately freaked out. A groan and some shuffling was heard behind him and he turned around to see that his hand was intertwined with Harry's. As if it was the quickest thing he's ever done, Louis cautiously snatched his hand back careful not to wake Harry up.

He continued to lay in his bed for a few more minutes trying not to cry. He wasn't feeling an overwhelming amount of sadness, it was just Harry. It's always Harry. The things he did always had to do with Harry. Harry, Harry, Harry. But this? This couldn't happen again and he hoped to god that Harry was never conscious when Louis was holding his hand. He didn't know why or how or when he held his hand but it wasn't good and there needed to be punishments. Reinforcements to ensure that Louis would never do it again.

So he rolled out of bed and headed to the shower making sure to stop by the drawer in his desk that he visited more often than he should. His room was dark, but he had no trouble maneuvering through it. He hopped into the shower bringing the small piece of metal with him— it hurt less in the shower. It barely hurt when he did it any other time because of he was just that numb but the shower made it easier because the skin was slick and tender, easy for the blade to slide across. And there was no extra time needed to clean up. After finishing up his 'punishment' and rinsing himself off, Louis headed to his wardrobe to put on his usual, sweatpants with a t-shirt and a zip hoodie, it was the weekend after all.

As he walked out his wardrobe, the sight of a human sprawled out on his floor made him jump back. It was only a few minutes but he forgot that Harry was physically in his room. The rays from the sun rising began to peak through the blinds, giving the room some sort of light. He hesitated before walking over to the boy stretched over his floor, squatting down to be able to reach him. One of Harry's legs was sticking straight out and the other was slightly bent towards the other. He laid on his stomach with his head facing away from Louis' bed. His long curls were straggled all over the pillow with both hands now placed under it. The blanket was scrunched up to the backs of his knees and went up just below his armpits.

As Louis knelt down to his knees and sat on his feet, he stared at the boy for a few seconds more, admiring the effortless beauty that was Harry Styles. No he doesn't want to like Harry, especially as much as he already does, but no one could deny just how beautiful he was. But he quickly snapped out of it and nudged him awake before Harry would wake up and see Louis staring at him.

"Harry?" Louis whispered. His hand rested on his shin as he shook him a little harder. "Harry wake up." Louis shook him a little more before Harry stirred awake.

He took a deep breath in and turned his head into the pillow as he shifted his legs and body. He groaned softly and croaked, "What time is it?"

Louis' eyes searched for the clock on his wall. "Seven forty-three," he recited softly but loud enough for Harry to hear. The house wasn't silent anymore. The sounds of Louis' mum making breakfast and his dad getting ready for work in the room next door (his only off day was Sunday and an occasional Saturday).

"Louis?" Harry questioned, jolting his head out of the pillow, but not enough to see Louis.

"That's me," he chuckled softly to himself.