The Foreigner & The Pessimist (malexmale)

30. Zuuro

I'm so anxious that there's an ache throbbing in my chest unlike anything I've ever felt before. An ache that tells me to race right back through that door to Lane's side, but...but I can't do that, can I? He asked me to leave. He doesn't want me there. He wanted me to go. My presence...my offered comfort couldn't calm him. All it did was just make everything worse.

And now, standing outside his door in the hall, I still don't quite understand why. I don't understand what I said or did that upset him so much. I don't understand how we went from me comforting him, to him suddenly becoming so obsessed with what happened after the party that he pushed himself to tears.

I've never seen Lane cry before, but stars, even thinking about it now makes my heart feel like it's being torn into a million little pieces. His cries were so...so full of anguish. So full of pain. I've never heard someone cry like that before, and it kills me to know that I couldn't help him. It kills me that his first instinct was to push me away.

I hear the handle of the door click as it opens, and watching as Dr. Edwards exits, passing me by without even a sideward glance. I frown. Is she angry with me? What did I do wrong? As she stops further down the hall to speak with Tsubasa – I hadn't even noticed him before now - I cross back to Lane's room and attempt to open the door.

But it doesn't budge. It's locked. She locked the door. Does Lane truly not want to see me so badly that this is his solution?

I glance back down the hall to find them both watching me now; arms folded across their chests and faces unreadable. Just...staring. It sends a chill right down my spine. Is this where it happens? I wonder. Is this when Tsubasa's odd toleration of me these past few days finally ends? Is this where he tells me to leave now and never return?

Dr. Edwards beckons me forward, as she turns and begins walking in the opposite direction, obviously wanting me to follow. But I don't. Not right away. Not until I've tried the door a few more times to make sure it's truly locked. Not until I'm sure that following is my only option for getting any answers as to what's going on.

Catching up isn't too hard. Especially since they both purposefully keep their pace slow until they hear me fall into step behind them. But even then, neither speaks. Not a word. And I don't either. Not as they lead me through the maze of halls, or as we step into a crowded elevator, going up, up, up until we're the only three left. Not as we get off again on what seems to be the top floor, only to enter the stairwell and go up even further. Up to another door. A door with a keypad, that Dr. Edwards blocks from my view as she enters the code and the door hisses open to reveal the Brooklyn skyline.

Only then do I realize my heartrate picking up again as a cold gust of wind swirls in around us, and my stomach does a little somersault. "The roof?" I ask, finally breaking the silence between us.

She nods, turning to face me; her expression still unreadable. "Privacy. The conversation we're about to have is one I need to be sure will only be heard by us."

I swallow hard as that unease continues swirling in my belly. I'm up higher than this almost every day at Unity High, but...but something about being here, so high up and out in the open with no walls or windows for security is making my legs feel like jelly and my head light. Focus, Zuuro. I tell myself, taking a breath to try to clear my head. "Why did you lock Lane's door? Did he ask you to?"

She hesitates a moment; her eyes still fixed on me as if she's staring through me rather than at me. "No...no, he didn't ask. He's sedated."

I frown. "Sedated?" I ask. Was that the only way she could calm him? I glance over to Lane's father who's now standing on the roof's edge, paying me little attention as his hand rubs absently over his jaw, clearly deep in thought. I look back to her. "Did I really upset him that much?"