Settle Down

Part sixteen

In Hayden's bed, white sheets mix with white skin. The sheer underwear she was wearing earlier lie at the foot of the bed, her arms tangled with Ash's above their heads. His feet seem to be dangling from the bed as he moves closer to her, trying to fill the whole space with his body on hers. He smiles a wide smile, passing his fingers through her messy hair. "The pink is fading."

She shushes him back to sleep but can't hide her smile. "I know. A lot is fading actually." She finally says, turning her face to his, eyes locked on his beautiful smile. The two of them stare at each other for a good two minutes before closing their eyes once more and cuddling again. 

This feels good. This feels like putting each other back into pieces, back into wholes. This feels like loving forever. Loving. This feels new.

***

It's noon, he thinks. And no one has yet dared to come and knock on Hayden's door. That's different. He remembers her house was somehting he could never stay too long in. But now it's been since last night and nobody seems to have noticed the white bedroom door still locked on the inside. Ashton moves a bit, feeling as if he was gonna end up choking on Hayden's hair at some point. "Babe?"

When she wakes, her eyes feel heavy and the rest of her body still sleepy as she tends to descends from Ash's body. She notices his eyes still staring at her, just like yesterday night. Just like that. "I don't want you to leave." She finally mumbles, crossing her arms around his chest, forcing him to face her. "Don't leave. I don't want to miss you."

Ashton clears his face of any blond or pink loks of hair and simply carresses her back, shifting to bring the last sheet remaining on the mattress back on her body. She shivers as he detaches his body from hers then locks herself once more using her legs around his. "Babe."

"Sounds like you've found yourself a new drug to rely on, uh?" He jokes, poking her left side while Hayden tends to slide back to sleep.

"You're my drug. You're mine."

***

Ash knew he'd need to find a job when in Northwich. Dee had already spoken to him about the drive from the new house to the hospital, and about the costs of living in such a big house. He wasn't surprised when she showed him her new pinboard, already filled with a paper calendar and a couple Emergency numbers written on a post-it. "This will fit just perfectly in the kitchen." She'd said, all proud of herself. Ash laughed it off and left the house, walking to Deansgate - to Hayden - for the third time this week. 

A job was a goal he had never really reached. Only if you don't count dealing on the side as one. This Saturday was going to be one of the last they'd spend together before the new year. Before the move. Ash knew she was getting better, she was getting used to being sober. He'd walked to the way to Deansgate and had hoped she would have eaten by now already. Teaching Hayden to start eating again, normally, to exercise and do stuff was like teaching Bambi to walk. Baby steps. He hoped she would feel better. If not forever, for today at least. He wanted to take her out and to dinner. He didn't want to see the boxes in Dee's house anymore, he didn't want to think about a job anymore. Today, Ash wanted to be okay. He needed to.

Four years ago today, on the 7th of December 2014, Beth Green Murphy died of a heart attack. Nobody was there to give her aspirin, nor to help her breathe through it, nobody could have called the ER, and obviously no one drove her. Four years ago, Dee was taking care of her two years-old daughter and checking on her brother who hadn't answered her texts all week. Four years ago, James Murphy had gone to the park where he had first met his wife so he could try to once again, talk to God about her. Asking Him if maybe, just maybe, he could do something about his ex-wife. Four years ago, Ashton Murphy was preparing a fix, telling himself it was the last one.