Try Again: Shawn Mendes ✔️

44

"Athena... Theo I told you not to tell her" my mums sighs as she sees me. "He's okay right?" I ask stopping in front of my mother, she was always the cool, calm and collected one but right now she looked awful.

She shakes her head hugging me. I hug her back closing my eyes.

I hiccup into her neck feeling a rush of pain through my body.

"Athena you're here" I hear Sam say. I step back nodding wiping my tears.

"Did no one want me here?" I ask, I was so exhausted emotionally and physically. "We just know you have a frail heart darling" mum says.

"So dads in the hospital and I'm not wanted here because I can't handle it?" I scoff.

"Babe calm down" Shawn takes my hand. I pull back from him. "Don't touch me" I mutter.

"Let me see him" I demand. Theo nods pointing to the room, I look around at them then take a deep breathe waking towards the door. Shawn follows behind me.

"I'll go alone" I tell him walking in. I almost immediately loose my mind. I move closer feeling myself becoming weak.

"Dad?" I whisper. He was hooked up to machines and his face was grazed.

My body takes me to the side of him and gently place my hand over his. My eyes looks over him and I feel my heart break, I start sobbing. I quickly put a hand over my mouth not wanting anyone to hear me, they all thought I was weak anyway.

"Miss we need to do a check up and visiting hours are over" a doctor walks in. "Oh- I've- ive only been here a few minutes... please just give me a few more minutes" I ask sighing.

"I'm sorry but it's policy, you have to leave"

I nod walking out to see everyone just stood around. "Oh Shawn Mendes? Are you related to Mr Carter?" She asks.

"Erm no, he's my girlfriends dad" Shawn says. "I suppose you could go in for a bit" she smiles at Shawn.

What. The. Fuck.

I wipe the tears from my eyes sitting beside my mum. "You'd think people would be professional in a situation like this" I mumble.

The doctor walks in and Shawn sits beside me.

"Is anyone going to tell me what happened?" I ask softly. "He got back on the track, I told him not to" Mum whimpers.

I nod not knowing what to say.

-
It had been three hours, Theo went home to Liv and Sam took mum home.

"How do you feel?" Shawn asks me. I take a deep breath looking down at our linked hands.

I feel like shit. My heart is aching, my brain feels fried, my mind isn't even here. I felt physically battered. This heavy weight drowned onto my shoulders.

"Fine" I mumble. "Should I get you something to eat-"

"I know you've been taking to Camille" I blurt out. I could not, for the life of me keep it in. It bothered me more than I expected.

"Oh" he lets out. I face him with tears in my eyes. "Why?" I ask.

His eyes meet mine, his soulful eyes. "I don't think this is the right time to be talking about this, just know it's not what you think Athena" he sighs placing a hand on my cheek.

"I- I don't know what to think-"

"Excuse me? Could I please have a picture?" I get cut off. I look up seeing a boy and girl.

"Go ahead" I mumble. I get up walking away to the bathroom leaving Shawn.

I locked the door putting the toilet seat down and I sat down and began bawling. My eyes were burning from the tears, I didn't feel present, I was living but I wasn't here.

My mind was everywhere and no where at the same time. I couldn't help but think me and Shawn are not meant to be. The universe brought us back together to show me how bad we were together. We fight and make up like it's mundane. There's always something going on.

We've never just been us. Just me and him, feeling so in love and with each other.

I do love him, I don't think I stopped ever but right now I'm this state mind I'm questioning it all.

"Miss, are you okay in there?"

I quickly get up wiping my eyes. I walk out nodding at the woman.

"Oh you're Athena Carter, your show is tomorrow" she says happily.

I had completely forgot.

"Yeah" I nod. "I hope you're okay, I look forward to show" she smiles walking out. I follow going back to Shawn. He stands up taking my hands.

"You need a break, we're going out" he says gently.

"I don't want to, I want to be here" I mumble sitting down. "Athena, baby come on" he sighs crouching down in front of me. It's like a light bulb went of in his mine as eyes go all soft.

"Tell me, lay it all on me Athena" his hands rest on my thighs. I breath in deeply readying myself to talk.

"I don't understand anything Shawn, the show is tomorrow and my mind is blank. Like I don't know what's going on, should I even go?" I begin. "And this, my dad- he's in there and god knows what might happen, I don't want to think about it at all" I hiccup and he places a hand on my jaw.

"And Camille, I thought you were don't with her. I don't know what it is but I don't feel comfortable knowing you're talking with her, Shawn you told me you had to pay her to keep quiet, why are you talking? I want to know but then I don't" I say, my voice sounding so awful and broken.

"And- and the babies, I want children... I do, like I really do but I know it's hurting you that I want to wait. I'm just sorry I can't be what you want... I pile on all this stress and this worry, I don't want to loose you because of it" I whimper using my hands to cover my face as I weep.

"Athena darling, there's no way you're going to loose me. I need you to know and understand that I'm here for you, I want to know it all. And I want to talk properly when we're okay, emotionally" he says.

I still felt a horrible feeling in my heart and I just couldn't put it into words.