Welcome
My name is Adam Henderson. Friends may call me Adam, or those who wish to sprinkle our embraces with a greater scope of informality may address me as Hendo before promptly cupping my arse. That would be my arse cheeks and not the exit to my anal tract. You may address me as Sir until our relationship boundaries have become fully formed.
It's often said that a complaint handled correctly will result in the customer reaffirming the relationship with the company. It is cheaper to keep existing customers than acquiring new customers. Also, a person who has a bad experience is far more likely to tell a larger audience than someone who had a good experience. The last thing a company wants is to have a reputation for incompetences communicated to the masses.
Companies are prepared to give out freebies to keep you quiet and content, whilst still promoting their product. These are tough economic times, the most worrying since 2003 when I'd pissed away two student overdrafts on booze and had to settle for a meal of Salmon spread and McCoy Crisps on Toast for three nights running. A most tasty treat. It'd be silly not to take advantage of this goodwill from pillars of the business and commerce community.
Now the disclaimer part. The purpose of my complaints is to pass off ridiculous statements and idiotic events in the context of a complaint to a) see how serious the company takes my grievance, and b) to see what kind acts of goodwill they are prepared to make. My complaints are not designed as blackmail, and neither do I make any demands for payment by means of compensation. Now let's see what I can acquire!
So kick off your shoes, stretch out those creamy hamstrings, and have a wonder around my words.
Hendo.
YOU ARE READING
Kick Off and Cash In
Non-FictionI've worked in numerous companies performing various roles within the Insurance and Finance Industry, a heavily regulated environment. I've handled complaints and arsehole customers for years. It's often said that a complaint handled correctly will...
