I Rant

Rant 3: Your Penile Circumcision is not the Same as my Abortion

So we all know that being sexist sucks. It's a given. But sexism is also super fucking dangerous. Sometimes we go through our lives with blinders on, I am guilty of doing this myself, and we don't notice just how sexist some things and people are. Recently I saw a post on my Facebook feed that made me literally see red. I didn't comment on it and try to argue with the guy because I know that he is irrational. (I would delete him but I can't because he is super unstable and I don't want to like trigger him or anything. I know fuck him but like more worried about my safety and stuff.)  But this post, this fucking post, made me so unbelievably angry.
It said:

 "Girls want abortion to be just up to them since its their body but circumcision effects me and i want that to be up to me. I wouldn't ever change what i had done. It benefits me for the better but i understand not everyone feels the same. I feel like it would be a lot harder to live with if it was done later time in someones life. Idk bro just time travel and tell your parents no ig, its not that hard" 

It's okay you can read it more than once and it still doesn't make sense. There was literally no context, just this text post, with the quotation marks. I have literally no idea where he took the quote from, or anything like that. And like it just plain doesn't make any sense, like what? But apart from the just horrible lack on context (is it a meme without pictures? A conversation he had? Literally no fucking clue!), the dangerous part of this is that someone (him? Again no context. Fuck people are stupid) is likening abortion to circumcision. And just stop. No. just fucking no. They are in no way the fucking same thing. I don't agree with circumcision without medical cause (an old FWB of mine needed to get one because of a medical condition where his foreskin was slowly getting tighter and was causing him a shit ton of pain), I am a bit iffy about those who do it for religious reasons as well just because the baby can't say if they believe in the religion or not (I am not a fan of infant baptism either for this reason). 
But regardless of my stance on penile circumcision (cause we all know that vaginal/vulval circumcision serves no medical purpose and is only used to treat those with vulvas as second class citizens) likening it to abortions and a person's right to terminate is just disgusting and a perfect example of  misogyny (For me misogyny covers everyone who identifies as female and/or has the reproductive capabilities to carry children, cause not every woman has a vulva and not everyone with a vulva is female!). Circumcision is not the same as an abortion, and while removing part of a person's genitals is horrible it should not be considered to be on the same level as being forced to bring another person into the world. Pregnancy has so many risks associated with, more so than penile circumcision. Pregnancy involves gigantic changes to the body, both hormonal and physical. There is something literally growing inside of you, a thing that will move, cause you to be sick, and can even kill you. Pregnancy is safer now than before but by no means is it as low-risk as penile circumcision. 
The freedom to chose to have an abortion should be the right of the person who is pregnant and literally no one else. It is your body that will have to go through the changes, and it is your life that is at risk. 
I am so tired of cis men trying to control the reproductive rights of others, and sexism in general. Like it is my body my choice and this literally applies to everyone. Like okay so infants with penises don't have a choice surrounding their circumcision (or lack of) but that doesn't mean that those who have the ability to carry children shouldn't have bodily autonomy either, it means that we shouldn't be circumsizing people while they are unable to understand the procedure barring any medical needs of course. And there are literally no medical benefits to baring a child. Forcing people to have children they don't want has literally no medial reasons behind it. The risks associated with medically safe abortions are less than the risks of carrying a fetus to term. 
When it comes to abortions there is nothing to compare them to. They are their own thing entirely and have no comparison to any procedure that involves the penile reproductive system. Abortions carry so much social stigma. I have never had an abortion personally (sorry for the misleading title but it sounded the best) but I have friends who have, and watching them have to make that decision was heartbreaking. It is something that follows you for your entire life. My close friend had an abortion a few years ago, and they would have made a wonderful parent. They are amazing with children and now are an Auntle (they are non-binary so we came up with the term. Choosing Auntle over Unt because it sounded too close to cunt and children tend to mispronounce words) to a beautiful little girl. They would have been an amazing and loving parent, but they were not ready and not fit enough to go through with the pregnancy. The pregnancy was also a result of rape, their partner at the time forced himself upon them claiming it was his right as a man in a relationship. My friend and their rapist had broken up earlier that day and were supposed to be talking things over when it happened. They found out they were pregnant a few weeks later and came to me crying. We discussed their options and they decided for themselves that abortion was the right call for them. That is the important part, it was my friend's choice.
Now if some people with penile reproductive systems had their way my friend would have had to call their rapist and get his permission, or they would have been forced to bring the pregnancy to term and give birth to their rapist's baby. Now some would argue that in cases like my friend that abortion would be given without hesitation, but at the time my friend didn't believe that they had been raped, they just said "I didn't really want to but he did anyways and I didn't have condoms". They believed that it was their fault for not being on birth control and not having condoms nearby. Which is totally ridiculous since it was the rapist's fault for raping them and getting them pregnant.  But since my friend at the time didn't believe that they were raped, and didn't press charges the likely-hood that they would have been able to get an abortion because of rape would have been low.  But since we live in Canada and safe legal abortions are a thing here they were able to have the pregnancy terminated and go on to live their life. Since the abortion they have been able to do so many wonderful things that they would not have been able to do if they had been forced to carry a pregnancy to term. They are now a Nurse and are saving people's lives, something that they would not have been able to do if they had not had the abortion. They also would have stayed with the rapist as they would have been biologically connected to him. Yes adoption is a thing but my friend would not have been able to give a child up, because as I sad they adore children and want to be a parent, and the rapist would have heard about the birth and he would have used it as an excuse to force himself into their lives. My friend did inform him that they were going to get an abortion and he was supportive (guess he felt bad for rapping them, what a good chap (sarcasm because he is literal trash and should be in jail or dead) ) at the time but soon he began to hold it over them and stalk them for moths afterwards. Saying things about wanting to try again and have a child with them. This is just further proof that having the ability to chose is a beautiful thing and keeps people safe. 
Abortion is not a pretty thing, every year my friend has a memorial day for the child they never had; a sort of birthday. They hurt every year, but that hurt is nothing compared to being forced to bare a child that they didn't plan on, and then being forced to either care for it or give it up. Abortions are so much more than just a procedure that cold-hearted child-hating people have, they are not used as an alternative to birth control, they are not small. They save lives. They save families. More importantly the ability to choose saves lives. If my friend had been forced to not have an abortion they would not be a nurse, they wouldn't have met their niece and her family, they wouldn't have been able to grow as a person, and most importantly they would not have been able to raise a child with all the love, support and stability that it would have deserved. 

So don't come at me with the "penile circumcision is the same as abortions" cause a little bit of dick skin is nothing compared to forcing people to carry a pregnancy to term. 

This has been a weird rant brought to you from yours truly, 

M. Alice